Daily Archives: June 18, 2015
LGBT Latino Artists Threatened After San Francisco's Gay Cholo Chicano Mural Defaced
LGBT Latino Artists Threatened After San Francisco's Gay Cholo Chicano Mural Defaced
A cholo mural depicting LGBT Chicanos in San Francisco’s Mission District was defaced Tuesday. Despite violent threats on social media, the artists and gallery refuse to be silenced or shamed.
Yezmin Villarreal
5 Things My Husband Teaches Our Daughter About Working Parents
5 Things My Husband Teaches Our Daughter About Working Parents
Dear Jason,
You’ve worked full-time since our daughter Lily was born 10 years ago; I had that first summer off to be with her, and then I too went back to work, in a complicated algorithm of multiple part-time gigs. As is true for most families with two working parents, this was dictated by the economy, not whim or simple choice. Day jobs notwithstanding, we both dove into hands-on parenting from the start.
But as I met other people with infants, I discovered that this was not universal, especially for single-worker families; often, whoever was employed (typically a dad) felt entitled to leave all concrete parenthood to the at-home partner (most often a mom). I’ve also watched this dynamic solidify as kids got older, even after the at-home parent returned to work. (And this is in a state considered the bluest of the blue!)
For all our flaws and failings (which Lily will surely recount in therapy someday), I’m glad that kind of imbalance is not our way of life, and that you don’t see parenthood in those terms. Instead, you’re modeling how to share the burdens and privileges of raising a child, teaching lessons I hope she’ll recall in the future if she chooses to be a mom.
1. Parenting is work.
Any task you do for hours and hours, week after week, knowing that there are both high expectations and serious consequences for failure, qualifies as work (no matter how much you love it). In the first months, when I was home alone with the baby, and then during the year I only worked a few days a week, you never treated the time I spent with her as a “day off” for me. True leisure, the power of choice when it comes to one’s use of time, is in short supply for stay-at-home parents, and you respected that. You made sure I got time out of the apartment, swapped out with me when possible, and never whined, “I had to work all day while you stayed at home.”
2. Workers still parent.
I’ve observed a fair number of dads who think their real work is done when they leave the office, and that simple presence at home is good enough; some feel as if fielding requests for other contributions to family life implies that their daytime efforts are not appreciated. But even when you had that one miserable job with the co-worker from hell, you never questioned the need to go straight from work to pick Lily up from her after-school program, or to take your turn at doing the bedtime ritual. If Lily was sick, you were quick to offer up your own personal days to stay with her. Why? Because that’s your job, too.
3. Chores don’t know gender.
Coming home from paid work to face domestic chores is never a thrill. Cooking, laundry, housecleaning, helping with homework, packing lunches — there’s no holiday bonus for any of it. A fair number of my friends who are working moms have complained that the bulk of these tasks still fall to them, though their husbands could help if they chose to. We each have our default chores, but Lily isn’t witnessing a division of duty by gender: in you, she sees a parent who can find time after work to wash her favorite dress for the school concert and repair her bicycle. As is demonstrated by many same-sex couples, and as stay-at-home dads prove every day, a Y chromosome doesn’t render you physically incapable of cooking a meal or sweeping a floor.
4. “It’s not my job” doesn’t fly.
Because we both work, all of these in-house chores must be accomplished in the few hours between arriving home and falling into bed. Sometimes, it’s just not possible for one dad to do all his tasks; instead of keeping a rigid mental tally of who-did-what, we pitch in. When the laundry (“your” task) started feeling endless a couple of years ago, you asked me to help fold it more often, so I did. When my work hours changed and kept me away from home longer, you picked up some of the dog-walking (“my” task). From dishes to dry cleaning, Lily sees a constant hand-off system — which means that when she tries to duck out of a task that isn’t “hers,” she knows what we’ll say: “We’re a family. We all do our part.”
5. Vacation time is required.
Few people love any job so much that they never need a day off. The reality of being a parent is that, unlike with other types of work, you can’t predictably clock in and clock out. (And forget about setting your own hours.) But the healthiest, happiest parents are ones who do get breaks — and whose partners consider this essential. You safeguard my writing time and send me off to the movies when I’m stressed. And I return the favor, making sure you hop on your bicycle and ride off into some free time. I know that having a few hours to yourself is restorative and makes it possible for you to keep doing all the kinds of work you do so well.
To Lily, none of this is unusual; it’s just how parents are. I’m grateful that she has you for a dad.
Happy Father’s Day,
Dave
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Adam Darkfold: Sky Pose
Rick Santorum Argues Heterosexual Parents Are a ‘Birthright’
Rick Santorum Argues Heterosexual Parents Are a ‘Birthright’
The archconservative seeking the GOP presidential nomination believes ‘the breakdown of the nuclear family’ is to blame for America’s troubles.
Dawn Ennis
www.advocate.com/politics/2015/06/18/rick-santorum-argues-heterosexual-parents-are-birthright
News: Charleston Church Shooting, The Moon, Zac Efron, $10 Bill
News: Charleston Church Shooting, The Moon, Zac Efron, $10 Bill
> President Obama speaks out on the Charleston Church shooting: “I don’t need to be constrained about the emotions that tragedies like these raise. I’ve had to make statements like this too many times. Communities like this have had to endure tragedies like this too many times. We don’t have all the facts but we know innocent people were killed because someone who wanted to inflict harm had no trouble getting their hands on a gun.”
> Charleston Church shooting suspect in custody, reportedly told Bible study group, “you rape our women, you’re taking over our country” before beginning his rampage.
> The moon is engulfed in a permanent, lop-sided dust cloud according to NASA.
> For a brief moment in 2000, the Clinton White House contemplated endorsing marriage equality.
> Jim Parsons to produce TV show on what it’s like to be gay and disabled.
> Chris Pratt would like you to objectify him a little more.
> Adam Scott and Paul Rudd were kicked out of a wedding for flashing their male members.
> Pope Francis set to release historical encyclical on climate change saying there is no excuse for destroying the planet.
> Zac Efron in a wrestling singlet.
> Lester Holt will replace Brian Williams as news anchor on NBC Nightly News.
> Treat yo’ self to some Marlon Teixeira hotness.
> The U.S. Treasury will put a woman on the $10 bill by 2020.
The post News: Charleston Church Shooting, The Moon, Zac Efron, $10 Bill appeared first on Towleroad.
Sean Mandell
News: Charleston Church Shooting, The Moon, Zac Efron, $10 Bill
Women Wingnuts Slam Sexy Chobani Ad Featuring Married Lesbians in Bed
Women Wingnuts Slam Sexy Chobani Ad Featuring Married Lesbians in Bed
One Million Moms says yogurt maker Chobani ‘should be ashamed’ of a TV commercial that they say tries to ‘normalize sin.’
Dawn Ennis
The 5 Emotional Stages Of Dudes Learning About Period Products
The 5 Emotional Stages Of Dudes Learning About Period Products
We’ll give them an A for effort… but that’s about it.
In a new video created by V.Point News and charity organization Plan U.K., six guys attempt to answer questions about different menstrual products and how each is used. From confused stares to worried looks, most of the dudes were underprepared for the period pop-quiz.
The dudes went through a whole spectrum of emotions on their crash course, including:
Confusion:
Fear:
Frustration:
Shock:
And, of course, awe:
“It looks like something the doctor checks your ears with,” one man said about a tampon. Another guy was having some trouble figuring out how women use a tampon: “This is some rocket science.”
When the host asked one man why he thinks people tend to not talk about menstruation, he responded: “The stigma around talking about menstruation is the bigger issue than [talking about] the tampon. No periods, no babies — no babies no future. So how important is it to understand about menstruation? It’s very important.” Preach.
Watch the full video above.
H/T Refinery29
— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Madonna’s New Party Hardy Video: “Epic” Or “Just Plain Sad”?
Madonna’s New Party Hardy Video: “Epic” Or “Just Plain Sad”?
Madonna just dropped the music video to her song “Bitch I’m Madonna,” the third single from her album Rebel Heart, and it has critics and fans divided.
The video, released Wednesday, depicts a pink-haired Madonna running amok in a hotel with a bunch of hard-partying 20-somethings, making out with guys and girls (shocking!), dancing on furniture, throwing drinks in people’s faces, sporting that g.d. grill again and generally behaving in a way a 56-year-old mother of four definitely should not. It seems like a giant fuck you to all her ageist haters, and we applaud the songstress for that.
Related: Madonna Kicks Everyone’s Ass In Her New Music Video
The video also features blink-and-you’ll-miss-them cameos (if you can even call them that) from Beyonce, Katy Perry, Miley Cyrus, Kanye West and Rita Ora, as well as Madonna’s two sons, Rocco and David. Nicki Minaj also makes an appearance via green screen. Comedian Chris Rock and designer Alexander Wang are there, too, for some reason. Oh, and Diplo.
Yet despite having all the right ingredients (a catchy song, a colorful video, a star-studded cast), the Daily Beast called “Bitch I’m Madonna” “just plain sad.” Reviewer Kevin Fallon wrote, “At worst, it’s desperate. At best, it’s just dumb.” Meanwhile, Rolling Stone called it “epic” and a “blowout party.”
Those are two vastly different responses to the same 4:03 music video.
Related: Andy Cohen And Sandra Bernhard Hilariously Narrate Madonna’s Apocalyptic Musical Fantasy
Queerty Instagram followers had similarly polarized responses. When we posted about the video earlier today, people had a lot to say.
“It’s dreadful,” Instagram user grape_p0p wrote. “I am concerned she is not well and is being managed by a complete misogynist. Something is wrong.”
“It’s a fun party video for a fun party song,” jackbnimble80 commented. “It’s not that serious.”
Check out the video below and let us know what you think about it in the comments. (Then follow us on Instagram!)
Graham Gremore
Sandra Bernhard Will Officiate Lea DeLaria’s Wedding – VIDEO
Sandra Bernhard Will Officiate Lea DeLaria’s Wedding – VIDEO
Orange is the New Black star Lea DeLaria has announced that Sandra Bernhard will officiate her wedding to Chelsea Fairless.
I am checking off each day next summer @realleadelaria & @Cat_Party wedding? I’ll just keep it open t.co/yiArJJ2EbB
— Sandra Bernhard (@SandraBernhard) June 17, 2015
The wedding will take place “next summer or fall” and DeLaria intends to invite her Orange co-stars.
Speaking to Page Six, DeLaria said:
“Sandra Bernhard is going to marry us because she’s a really good pal. It’s going to be in New York, but we’re still trying to find the spot!
“We’re going to do a night wedding and we’re going to go right to the dancing. We’re not doing a sit-down dinner. We’ll have Mexican trucks…stuff like that.”
DeLaria and Fairless announced their engagement last February.
The post Sandra Bernhard Will Officiate Lea DeLaria’s Wedding – VIDEO appeared first on Towleroad.
Michael Fitzgerald
Sandra Bernhard Will Officiate Lea DeLaria’s Wedding – VIDEO