Town in Arkansas Continues Debate Over Non-Discrimination Ordinance
Eureka Springs, Arkansas, has been to known to some has a safe haven for the LGBT community in the South.
HRC.org
Monthly Archives: April 2015
America’s Got Talent Contestant Reveals He’s HIV-Positive And In A Happy Relationship
America’s Got Talent Contestant Reveals He’s HIV-Positive And In A Happy Relationship
James Clark, Branden James
From age twenty forward, I’d certainly exercised my right to be an individual. I was rather grounded at home as a serial monogamist, jumping from one long term relationship to another. Out of the house, however, I lived a sordid life experimenting with drugs and exploring various sexual avenues. These acts of self-sabotage seem to be a rite of passage for many in the gay culture especially. But then again, I’m a product of Generation X, and I think most of us have been there, regardless of sexuality. About halfway through my twenties, I was in a free STD testing clinic called, The Spot in West Hollywood. I was no stranger to getting a routine panel of examinations to make sure I was rid of anything sexually transmitted. I’d had relationships with HIV-positive guys in the past. Sometimes we slipped up. It happens. It was the mid 2000’s and this was at the time in HIV care when doctors thought it was better to wait to take medications until you had to. There was nothing like PreP available at the time, so the risk of transmission was likely.
A week passed. It was nearly time to go back and get my test results. The next day I went in and waited nervously in the holding room. A large African American woman stepped out of one of the examination rooms and called my name. I sunk in my chair as if trying to hide myself and shamefully walked in. I guess I expected the inevitable given my recent behavior. And my expectation was right. The woman told me I was HIV+. I remember her being so kind and giving me a hug and some reassurance like my mom might. She said, “You’re gonna be fine Hun. You’re gonna be just fine.”The most daunting thing about becoming positive was not the supposed death sentence (which even ten years ago really only existed in the realm of fear), It was the guilt and shame that I carried with me which was daunting. After all, I lived in L.A., the land of judgmental people; according to many. I felt like I had done something wrong, when in actuality, I was just wanting to be loved like all of us- and having sex is simply a part of human nature. I formed a major complex about what people would think of me. It had become so bad I was concerned that people could actually ‘see’ I was HIV positive. I kept it a deep dark secret to everyone except the trusted few. Fast forward 10 years and here I am now. I’ve decided that I can’t allow myself to feel isolated anymore. I’ve grown up my entire feeling different- feeling like I didn’t belong. But being unique is interesting. Being different sets you apart from everyone else. I realized that we’re all given circumstances in life, and if we don’t share those stories which make up who we are, we miss out on so many opportunities to inspire people and help people. So I decided to be brave and write about it in this very visible magazine. I recently stood up in front of a crowd of 140 strangers the other day and told them. I had planned to tell America’s Got Talent about it when I was on the show, but my partner at the time was afraid of the backlash it might cause for his own life. The biggest obstacle of all was telling my parents, just a couple of months ago. I had been through nearly ten years of worrying what they would think- how they would react. When I told them, all they could say was, ‘I’m sorry we weren’t there for you. I’m sorry you felt like you couldn’t tell us.’ After telling them, My Dad walked across the living room of my house and gave my boyfriend James a big hug. He said, ‘thank you for being such a good friend to my son.’ I can’t tell you how much that touched me. I was suddenly free from pain I’d been carrying around for more than a decade. I’ve spent so much of my life being someone else in order to spare people’s feelings. I hid behind my fear of embracing and owning who I am. It’s time I changed that. I believe life works out the way it’s supposed to. And mine has certainly come full circle.?”
— Branden James, a finalist on season eight of America’s Got Talent, in an interview with ATeen magazine about his relationship with musical collaborator James Clark
Jeremy Kinser
Michele Bachmann: 'Wonderful' End Times Imminent Thanks to Gay Marriage and Obama – VIDEO
Michele Bachmann: 'Wonderful' End Times Imminent Thanks to Gay Marriage and Obama – VIDEO
In an interview with End Times broadcaster Jan Markell, former Rep. Michele Bachmann went full Bachmann, telling listeners to “not despair but rejoice” that Jesus Christ’s return is imminent thanks to Obama’s efforts to “ensure that Iran has a nuclear weapon,” as well as the judicial branch’s role in legalizing abortion and marriage equality.
It’s only Monday, but this is probably the most bat s–t conversation you’ll hear all week.
Listen, AFTER THE JUMP…
[h/t Right Wing Watch]
Kyler Geoffroy
Lack of Competent Providers Leaves Many LGBTs Uninsured & Untreated
Lack of Competent Providers Leaves Many LGBTs Uninsured & Untreated
Many LGBT people are either uninsured or delay seeking medical treatment, and the reason is simple: a lack of LGBT-friendly health care providers.
Raffy Ermac
www.advocate.com/health/2015/04/20/lack-competent-providers-leaves-many-lgbts-uninsured-untreated
My Transgender Life – Reflections
My Transgender Life – Reflections
See the pretty girl in that mirror there?
Who can that attractive girl be?
Such a pretty face
Such a pretty dress
Such a pretty smile
Such a pretty me!
–Steven Sondheim 1957, from West Side Story
There have been many days when I did not want to look in a mirror. Many, many days!
Reflection’s can be funny things. There are reflections of our outer surface, and there are also the deep inner reflections that each individual process their way through. How many of the following questions do you reflect on?
• Who am I?
• Where do I belong?
• What am I doing with my life?
• Will anyone ever really love me?
It is excruciating difficult when one is so busy working on answering these internal questions and then see the reflection of their outer surface does not match how they see themselves internally.
I know what this is like! Denying and hiding my struggle with gender identity for close to 60 years has made me familiar with how often the reflection I see in a mirror belies my true self. Many times it was easier to believe what I saw in my reflection rather than the truth inside of me. After all, isn’t what I saw in the mirror the same as how other people saw me? How could I ever hold on to all of those relationships if I told them they were not seeing the true me? My inner reflections told me that there would be no way to do this. Absolutely no way!
…
I was ten years old when West Side Story opened on Broadway, and it was not long before I heard the song “I Feel Pretty” on the radio. “See the pretty girl in the mirror there” was already triggering my internal reflection. Ten years old and I could not even begin to understand what this meant, and I dare not tell anyone about this. I was already trying on my mom’s clothes when she was not home. I had no idea why and I just could not stop doing this. I climbed on the bed to look in the mirror over the dresser and would dream, and hum that song to myself, while carefully listening to make sure there was not a key scratching to open the front door. I wanted so much to be the girl I saw in the mirror. That girl was definitely inside of me. I knew she was, but there was no way she could get out and be seen except when I would dress up like this. I also thought that there must be something seriously wrong with me. Life was clearly going to be a challenge.
It took me a long time to realize that I was not alone, and that being transgender is not the only reason that people may struggle with mirrors and reflections. The questions I asked above seem to part of the package of being human. In my almost seven decades working through my life, I have met very few people who do not ask themselves at least one of those questions, either at some point during their life or constantly. Perhaps dealing with one’s gender identity is not so different than each person’s search for his or her own truth. I believe that his is an absolute truth! It is one that we hardly talk about, as we try so hard to fit in to some mold that our culture and family teaches us. How many people feel they must, must deny or hide who they truly are?
For those of us who are transgender and choose to be visible visible in the wider world, perhaps we are becoming a model for others that it is OK to be and express your truth, no matter what it is – of course, within the bounds of doing no harm. Now wouldn’t that be something? I have learned that there is nothing wrong with me for being, accepting and living my truth. I hope that everyone can learn to both live their own truth and accept others who choose to live and express theirs. I dream of the day when the term “people like us” takes on the meaning of people who are free to be just who they are without any conditions or judgments or discrimination. I like this dream. I like it a lot.
I no longer have my old problem with mirrors. For me it took a long time, and the decision to make my outside match my inside. This is certainly one of many possible solutions available, and each of us needs to find our own.
I have learned to be OK with what I now see in my reflections. My internal picture of who I am is now in alignment with the reflection of my outer self. In the Afterword of my book No! Maybe? Yes! Living my Truth, I share how valuable reflections are to me now:
She loves watching the snow now. She takes in a very deep breath–and calmly squeezes her eyes into a smile that can focus sharply. She closely watches flake after flake float by and is always so curious to see how each is unique.
She doesn’t know how, still loving the mystery of it all, but she knows she is connected in some way to each and every snowflake. She loves the warm feeling that flows when she recognizes the beauty in each one of them.
She steps away from the window and catches her own reflection. Her smile steadily grows as she notices the same warm feeling flowing through her entire body as she recognizes the beauty in herself.
###
Grace Stevens is a transgender woman who transitioned at the age of 64 and holds a Masters Degree in Counseling Psychology. She is a father of three, grandparent of two, athlete, advocate and author of No! Maybe? Yes! Living My Truth, an intimate memoir of her personal struggle to transition and live her true life authentically as a woman. For more information about Grace, her work and how Gender Variance Education and Training can help you, visit her website at: www.graceannestevens.com/. Follow Grace on Twitter: www.twitter.com/graceonboard .
— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
News: Justin Timberlake, PrEP, Jon Stewart, Cuba, Mac & Cheese
News: Justin Timberlake, PrEP, Jon Stewart, Cuba, Mac & Cheese
Former Ohio Gov. John Kasich says he’s waiting on a signal from God before he decides whether to enter the 2016 GOP race.
Batman v Superman teaser posters released.
Former military officials file SCOTUS brief encouraging a pro-equality marriage ruling, noting that gay service members may be sent against their wishes to states that don’t recognize same-sex marriage.
Justin Timberlake shares first photo of newborn son Silas.
Jon Stewart reveals why he’s quitting The Daily Show. “It’s not like I thought the show wasn’t working any more, or that I didn’t know how to do it,” explained Stewart in an interview with The Guardian. “But I’m not getting the same satisfaction.”
Sources dispute reports that Bobbi Kristina Brown is “no longer on life support”
UK party leaders David Cameron, Nick Clegg and Ed Miliband praise Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis (PrEP) during a Q&A for Gay Times magazine.
Tim Tebow is headed back to the NFL.
Kraft has announced it will remove synthetic colors from its mac & cheese.
Zayn Malik breaks month long Twitter silence.
A reputed Indian doctor committed suicide Saturday, leaving behind a note that said her marriage had not been consummated because her husband was gay.
North Carolina grandfather’s obituary asks mourners to honor his memory by not voting for Hillary Clinton.
Aaron Taylor-Johnson on his marriage to director Sam Taylor-Wood, who is 24 years his senior: “I don’t engage with [talk about the age gap]. At an early age when I saw articles, it just f-cked me up … What does it even f-cking matter about our age? I never noticed it when we fell in love with each other. And I don’t notice it now.”
Male model Monday: Alexander Staudal.
Demi Lovato recalls smoking weed with Joe Jonas for 4/20.
Are Brangelina planning another adoption?
Check out this incredible story of a same-sex marriage that took place in Colorado back in 1975.
Airbnb is heading to Cuba.
Kyler Geoffroy
https://youtube.com/devicesupport
Gay Couples React To Invasive Questions About Gender Roles (VIDEO)
Gay Couples React To Invasive Questions About Gender Roles (VIDEO)
We’ve heard it all before, and these vloggers are here to explain why there are just some things you should never ask a gay couple.
From YouTuber Ashley Mardell comes “Gay Couples React to Rude, Invasive Questions,” a look at someone of the most annoying questions that gay couples receive on a regular basis. The majority of the video’s conversation revolves around gender norms and people mistakenly trying to understand queer love through a male/female binary. All too often non-queer people assume that every relationship has to have someone playing the role of “man” and “woman” — even if the identities of the people in that relationship don’t fit these categories.
“Even in a straight relationship it’s not like every guy takes on those dominant roles,” one vlogger in the video explains. “There’s a lot of straight relationships that I know of where the girl is the most dominant person in the relationship.”
Check out the video above for a more nuanced understanding of why questions about gender roles are considered rude and invasive.
— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.
Ryan Gosling Responds To Dye-Job Haters
Ryan Gosling Responds To Dye-Job Haters
Did you guys hear the big news?!
No, not the Iran deal. It’s really just a framework, anyway.
And no, Hillary wasn’t spotted adding guac to her burrito bowl again (but we’ll let you know as soon as she is).
We’re talking about the big item of the weekend. Ryan Gosling dyed his hair. Brown. Brown! Can you imagine? And now he kinda looks like the guy who’d rent you a Ford Focus at Enterprise.
Well here to comment on his transformation is Ryan Gosling (aka Jimmy Fowlie):
Dan Tracer
feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/aSAAzFL74Cg/ryan-gosling-responds-to-dye-job-haters-20150420
Tonga Moves to Explicitly Ban Same-Sex Marriage
Tonga Moves to Explicitly Ban Same-Sex Marriage
The Polynesian island nation of Tonga has moved to explicitly ban same-sex marriage after community and church leaders expressed concerns that the country’s expected ratification of the Convention on the Elimination of All Forms of Discrimination Against Women (CEDAW) would open the door to same-sex marriage.
CEDAW, an international treaty adopted in 1979 by the United Nations General Assembly, guarantees certain rights for women including spousal choice and family planning.
Said Lopeti Senituli, chief executive of Internal Affairs:
“Under our existing Deaths, Births and Marriages Registration Act there is no specific reference for or against same sex marriage. The government is proposing now that we amend our Deaths, Births and Marriages Registration Act to prohibit same sex marriage.”
[h/t Radio New Zealand]
Kyler Geoffroy
www.towleroad.com/2015/04/tonga-moves-to-explicitly-ban-same-sex-marriage.html
