Home for the Holidays: Tips for Navigating Tough Conversations on LGBTQ Issues

Home for the Holidays: Tips for Navigating Tough Conversations on LGBTQ Issues

Every year during the holiday season, HRC receives many calls and emails from LGBTQ people asking us how to handle situations with family and loved ones when difficult conversations arise about sexual orientation and gender identity, particularly around the subject of religion. Whether or not you are out to your family, their negative beliefs and judgments about LGBTQ people can create a toxic environment.

And we know from experience that these situations often occur unexpectedly — when you’re gathered around the television watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade or a football game, in the kitchen  putting the finishing touches on the holiday meal, or between bites of turkey and pumpkin pie.

While these conversations can be hurtful and unsettling, to say the least, we cannot expect to change hearts and minds in the moment. But our experience over the years has taught us that there are effective strategies for navigating minefields LGBTQ people face when spending time over the holidays with friends and family who may not be supportive.

  • To prepare for questions regarding LGBTQ people and scriptural teachings, check out HRC’s “Coming Home” series of guides focusing on Catholicism, Judaism, Mormonism, Islam and general Christianity. These guides will help you craft answers to some of the more common questions, and might inspire you to start a conversation about moving toward a more accepting theology. Also take a look at HRC’s “A la Familia” conversation guide.
  • Avoid conversations in which scripture about a vengeful God are cited. Religion and faith are much more than scriptures. Remind people that God lives in all of us and loves each and every one of their creations. You may want to share our newest publication, Just As They Are, a resource to help parents recognize when and how conversion therapy is promoted, provides information about the dangers of the practice, and offers guidance to parents regarding practices that promote their child’s health and well-being.
  • If you are anxious about potential confrontations with family members, make a plan to stay safe. If you are traveling to visit family and can afford it, stay in a hotel, or with friends so you have a refuge if needed.
  • If you are not out to family and friends, HRC’s “Coming Out” resources provide valuable information, including how to make a decision that factors in your safety.
  • Remember, you don’t have to spend the entire week or weekend with your family. Sometimes a shorter visit is best for all. It’s okay if you choose to spend time with your family of choice where you know you can feel accepted and affirmed for who you are.

These tips aren’t just for Christmas, Kwanzaa, Hanukkah, New Year’s or Thanksgiving, but for all holidays and time spent with family, whether it be during Ramadan, Easter, Fourth of July or Passover.

Please remember that you are loved and your community is here to support you. If you need other resources do not hesitate to call The Trevor Project’s hotline at (866) 488-7386. You can also contact the National Suicide Prevention Hotline at (800) 273-8255 or the Trans Lifeline at (877) 565-8860.

www.hrc.org/blog/home-for-the-holidays-tips-for-navigating-tough-conversations-on-lgbtq-issu?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

New Editor of UK’s ‘Gay Times’ Fired for Anti-Semitic, Sexist, Racist Tweets

New Editor of UK’s ‘Gay Times’ Fired for Anti-Semitic, Sexist, Racist Tweets
Josh Rivers

Josh Rivers

Josh Rivers. Photo: Gay Times

By TOI staff The newly appointed editor of Britain’s prominent Gay Times magazine was fired Thursday after a series of anti-Semitic, homophobic and racist tweets emerged. Josh Rivers’s offending tweets exposed by BuzzFeed UK this week date back to 2010 and also disparage Africans, Asians, and overweight and homeless people. “Jews are gross. It’s the only…

The post New Editor of UK’s ‘Gay Times’ Fired for Anti-Semitic, Sexist, Racist Tweets appeared first on Towleroad.


New Editor of UK’s ‘Gay Times’ Fired for Anti-Semitic, Sexist, Racist Tweets

Brexit Briefing: Mutiny And A Bounty

Brexit Briefing: Mutiny And A Bounty
And so it began. This week the EU Withdrawal Bill hit Parliament for its Committee Stage.

This is where MPs can try to amend the legislation, and with the Government’s slim majority of 13 (rising to 25 when you count in ‘Labour Leavers’), there is a good chance changes could be snuck through thanks to the so-called Brexit Mutineers.

Theresa May and David Davis tried to head off two possible defeats with amendments of their own – yet both seemed to rile up potential rebels more than placate them.

The first was on putting the date of departure from the EU into the Bill – 11pm on March 29, 2019. This move was met with glee by Brexiteers, who were uneasy that the Bill only referred to an “exit date” without specifying when that would be.

For Remainers, such as former Attorney General Dominic Grieve and Tory grandee Ken Clarke, such a move only weakens the UK’s negotiating position.

They argued that by locking the date in statute, there is no flexibility to extend talks if a deal is close but not quite concluded by the day of planned departure.

Putting to one side whether the EU would want to extend the talks, having the departure date in the Bill isn’t as concrete as it appears. Under the Henry VIII powers also in the document, ministers have the power to change clauses of the Bill, including this one.

The second ‘concession’ was to give Parliament a meaningful vote on the deal. Labour’s Shadow Brexit Secretary Keir Starmer called it a “significant climbdown”, but as I explained here, it’s really not.

In short, MPs will be left with the choice of backing the deal the Government strikes or leaving the EU without any deal. Again, this is better news for Hard Brexiteers than remainers.

The debates themselves were a mixture of discussing the amendments (see Ken Clarke), and reheating the referendum slogans about remainers not being confident enough that the UK could govern itself (looking at you, Priti Patel).

There’s another six days of debate in committee stage – that’s almost 50 hours. Fingers crossed the quality improves.

2)  Business Groups Believe There’s A 50% Chance Of ‘No Deal’

Promising MPs they will get a vote on the deal, depends, of course, on whether a deal can be struck at all.

Business groups from across Europe were invited to Downing Street this week to tell Theresa May and David Davis what they wanted to see from the negotiations with Brussels.

After the chat, Emma Marcegaglia, head of the BusinessEurope lobby group, said in an interview: “I asked Davis whether he still thought a deal was possible.

“He said there was a 50-50 chance.”

A spokesman for the Brexit secretary described the comments as “categorically untrue”, adding “David Davis did not say this.”

But a veteran Eurosceptic Tory MP also gave that ratio when I asked him this week what the chances of a deal were, and the EU’s chief negotiator Michel Barnier revealed the bloc was drawing up ‘no deal’ contingency plans.

He told French newspaper, Le Journal du Dimanche: “It’s not my option, but it’s a possibility.

“Everyone needs to plan for it, member states and businesses alike. We too are preparing for it technically.”

The Sun reported today that the Prime Minister is prepared to offer a £40billion bounty as a financial settlement to get the trade talks going – halfway between the UK’s previous position and what Brussels is holding out for.

3) No Beer And Sandwiches At Number 10 For Trade Unions

While the red carpet was rolled out to businesses this week, ministers are ignoring meeting requests with one of the UK’s biggest trade unions to discuss working people’s Brexit fears, the GMB chief has claimed.

Tim Roache, General Secretary of the 630,000-strong GMB union, said ministers had not responded to his offer to meet with him to discuss the UK’s negotiations with the EU.

His concerns over a lack of engagement were echoed by the Trades Union Congress (TUC), with one source telling HuffPost UK there’s been “very little” dialogue compared to what they believe is needed.

Speaking at an IPPR think tank event on Tuesday, Roache said: “There’s been no interactions with the Trade Union movement and the very real experiences – day-in day-out – what those people face.”

When asked by HuffPost UK if a similar Downing Street meeting to the one given to the business community was penciled in for the trade union movement, Roache said: “There’s very little to say.

“Although we have offered ourselves up, we’ve said both through the TUC and particularly as the GMB that we want to work with Government.

“We have many experiences that we want to share and want to bring to the table, but we haven’t had a response.

“That’s very disappointing.”

The lack of engagement with the trade unions comes despite David Davis having his first meeting after being appointed Brexit Secretary with TUC General Secretary Frances O’Grady.

A DexEU spokesperson said it was “hearing from as many organisations, companies and institutions as possible, including trade unions, and will continue to do so as we move towards our exit from the EU.”

4) Brexit Killing Off Aston Martin Would Take Us Beyond Any Previous Understanding Of Irony

They are the words that Brexiteers dread to hear, but one of the UK’s most iconic brands warned this week that ‘no-deal’ would be “semi-catastrophic”.

Aston Martin’s chief financial officer Mark Wilson told MPs this week the company could have to halt production of all its cars if Theresa May fails to secure a Brexit deal.

The high-end car manufacturer makes all its vehicles in the UK, and Wilson told the Commons Business, Energy and Industrial Strategy Committee on Tuesday that leaving the EU without an agreement could hit exports dramatically.

Every car model in the UK currently is tested by the Vehicle Certification Agency (VCA) to make sure it is valid to be sold.

Currently VCA approved cars are able to be sold across the EU thanks to the UK’s membership.

However car manufacturers warned that in the event of a so-called ‘no-deal’ Brexit, the VCA approval would no longer be valid.

Wilson told MPs this would incur “significant costs” for the company as it tried to gets its models certified for sale abroad.

“We are a British company. We produce our cars exclusively in Britain and will continue to do so. Without VCA type approval it really is a stark picture for us,” he said.

He added the result could include “the semi-catastrophic effects of having to stop production because we only produce cars in the UK”.

5) Guess What? There’s Still Loads Of Warnings About Customs Delays

It seems that no matter how many times it is said, people still act shocked. This week there was yet another warning about customs delays after Brexit.

The Home Affairs Committee called for “urgent acceleration” in the contingency planning for a no deal if the UK is to avoid chaos at its borders.

In a report published on Thursday, MPs told ministers to reveal early in the New Year how Britain will handle customs checks if trade talks with the EU collapse.

The MPs also warned it would be “extremely damaging”, including to national security, if any agreement on a Brexit transition deal was delayed beyond the first quarter of 2018.

The warnings about customs delays are even more barbed now the Government has announced it will no longer try to build a lorry holding park in Stanford West in Kent to deal with lorry congestion heading towards Dover.

The 3,600-capacity lorry park was an alternative to Operation Stack, which sees lorries park up on the M20 heading into the port at times of cross-channel disruption.

In a written statement to MPs, Grayling confirmed no alternative to Operation Stack would be in place by the time the UK leaves the EU.

Grayling said Highways England would be looking into an “interim solution” for dealing with tailbacks to be in place by March 2019.

However, this will still involve lorries being parked up on the M20.

He said: “This could, for example, be through holding HGVs in the centre of the motorway rather than on the coastbound carriageway.

“Different technologies ranging from steel barriers to moveable barrier systems could be deployed to deliver these solutions.”

Don’t Get Angry, Get Blogging…

At HuffPost we love a good blog, and here are the finest Brexit-penned entries from this week. Have a read, and if any of them provoke an urge in you to speak your brain, send a blog to [email protected] and you could find yourself in this very newsletter.

Labour’s Jon Trickett on how the “weak, divided” government is harming real lives.

Paul Goldsmith on why you should care about legislation hidden in the EU Withdrawal Bill.

Maike Bohn on the “long and winding Brexit road” for EU nationals.

Charlie Proctor says thanks to Brexit ‘mutineers’ putting the country’s interests before their party’s.

www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/brexit-briefing-ken-clarke-withdrawal_uk_5a0dc9bce4b0c0b2f2f8a297

Gay Australian Senator Chokes Up Introducing Marriage Equality Bill into Parliament: WATCH

Gay Australian Senator Chokes Up Introducing Marriage Equality Bill into Parliament: WATCH
gay Australian senator Dean Smith

Australian Senator Dean Smith choked up as he introduced the marriage equality bill into parliament, initiating debate on the issue, which this week Australians approved in a nationwide postal vote.

Said Smith, choking up:

“Mr President, as a young man I never believed I could serve as a senior adviser to a Prime Minister or a Premier because I was a gay man,” Smith said. “John Howard and Richard Court both proved me wrong. And I never believed the day would come, when my relationship would be judged by my country to be as meaningful and as valued as any other.” He then paused to tear up. “The Australian people have proved me wrong.”

Added Smith:

“Let me be clear. Amendments that seek to address other issues or which seek to deny gay and lesbian Australians the full rights, responsibilities and privileges that they already have will be strenuously opposed. Australians did not vote for equality before the law so that equality before the law that is already gained is stripped away.”

Clip above. Full speech below:

The post Gay Australian Senator Chokes Up Introducing Marriage Equality Bill into Parliament: WATCH appeared first on Towleroad.


Gay Australian Senator Chokes Up Introducing Marriage Equality Bill into Parliament: WATCH

Bermuda Government Attempting to Repeal Marriage Equality

Bermuda Government Attempting to Repeal Marriage Equality

The government of Bermuda, a British Overseas Territory in the North Atlantic, is seeking to repeal marriage equality and replace it with a domestic partnership arrangement.  Bermuda achieved marriage equality through a Supreme Court ruling in May this year.  

The effort to repeal marriage equality is being led by the 38-year-old premier E. David Burt and his Progressive Labour Party government, which took power in July.  The Royal Gazette quoted Home Minister Walton Brown saying “…same-sex couples should have all the legal rights of heterosexual couples, save for marriage,” thus excluding loving same-sex couples from a right established by the Bermuda Supreme Court and effectively making them second-class citizens.

The draft bill for domestic partnerships is currently open for a two-week public consultation that ended yesterday.  The government is now expected to bring the bill to a vote and enact domestic partnerships and effectively abolish marriage equality.  Same-sex couples who are already married will not have their marriages voided.

The Supreme Court had ruled in May on a case brought by Bermudian Winston Godwin and his Canadian partner Greg DeRoche when the Registrar-General rejected their application to marry.  In a message to HRC, plaintiff Winston Godwin commented, “I think it’s very upsetting that once again we find ourselves having to fight for rights. This bill is discriminatory, it takes Bermuda a step in the wrong direction.”  His husband Greg DeRoche added, “Introducing this bill strips a choice from the LGBT community,” warning that it “can have major repercussions for Bermuda’s tourism, cultural and community relationships.”

According to Grant Spurling, a lawyer who represented the couple  in the marriage equality case, “the (Bermuda Supreme) Court is bound by legislation” under Bermuda’s legal system unlike in the U.S. where courts can overturn legislation or policies that violate the Constitution, thus Bermuda’s legislature has primacy over the courts in many instances.

The marriage equality victory followed a major setback in June 2016 when Bermudans by large margins rejected both marriage equality and same-sex civil unions in a referendum. Fortunately, the referendum was invalid as turnout did not meet the required 50 percent threshold.  Bermuda has made advances on LGBTQ rights in recent years, such as the decriminalization of consensual sex between men in 1994.

“For the new ‘Progressive’ Labor Party Government to overturn equality is shameful and despicable,” said Tony Brannon of Same Love Bermuda, an advocacy group that fought for marriage equality. “Please allow the Supreme Court of Bermuda ruling to stand and do the right thing for humanity.”

HRC will continue to follow developments in Bermuda.  Read more about our work here.

www.hrc.org/blog/bermuda-government-attempting-to-repeal-marriage-equality?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

Justin Tranter and the Transgender Chorus of LA call for more LGBTQ visibility in the music business in a powerful new film for Trans Awareness Week

Justin Tranter and the Transgender Chorus of LA call for more LGBTQ visibility in the music business in a powerful new film for Trans Awareness Week

GLAAD

Pop-songwriting powerhouse Justin Tranter released a powerful new short film to highlight the meaning of the close relationship between music and the LGBTQ community. The video, released by GLAAD as part of Transgender Awareness Week, gives an extended look into how music can be especially powerful for trans people, who too often do not see themselves reflected in the media. “If we don’t support the LGBTQ youth, if we don’t make them feel safe, we aren’t going to get all of this beautiful music…we can’t lose those to come,” he warns.

Tranter, who has penned hits for Britney Spears, Gwen Stefani, Kesha, Justin Bieber and many more called on some of his famous pals to help him explain how music can serve a beacon of hope for queer people.  “Music saved my life,” said country songwriter Shane McAnally who struggled with his sexuality for years before coming out. 

“Growing up queer has allowed me to not put boundaries on art, or colors, or life or anything,” RuPaul reveals, who has been making music for nearly 25 years.

Also captured in the emotional piece, which was directed by Steve Pyne and Mia Roe, is a firsthand account from trans people who explain how music helped them on their journey to self-acceptance.  The piece takes us inside teaching walls of the Trans Chorus of Los Angeles where the members feel safe and inspired.  “Finding music did help me with my soul after being bullied for so many years,” one member reflected.

Tranter, who also serves on GLAAD’s Board of Directors, says ultimately it was important to make this project because, “…there are more Elton [Johns], there are more Freddie [Mercuries], and there are more Melissa [Etheridges]…” out there that need to be discovered.

The Medals Project ‘For God and Country’, planned on January 20, the anniversary of the inauguration with images of ribbons and medals of Trans soldiers and vets telling their stories with the Trans Chorus of LA performing the best of Americana at St John’s Cathedral.

 

November 16, 2017

www.glaad.org/blog/justin-tranter-and-transgender-chorus-la-call-more-lgbtq-visibility-music-business-powerful-new