{"id":96600,"date":"2019-09-15T12:25:25","date_gmt":"2019-09-15T16:25:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/dad-rejected-him-for-being-gay-but-sons-hiv-diagnosis-changed-everything\/"},"modified":"2019-09-15T12:25:25","modified_gmt":"2019-09-15T16:25:25","slug":"dad-rejected-him-for-being-gay-but-sons-hiv-diagnosis-changed-everything","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/dad-rejected-him-for-being-gay-but-sons-hiv-diagnosis-changed-everything\/","title":{"rendered":"Dad rejected him for being gay but son\u2019s HIV diagnosis changed everything"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dad rejected him for being gay<\/a> but son\u2019s HIV diagnosis changed everything<\/b><\/p>\n

\"\"
Shareef Hadid Jenkins and his father, Roberto Rashid (Photo: Supplied)<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

A man<\/a> has shared details of how his family rejected when he came out as gay<\/a>. However, being diagnosed as HIV has enabled him to forge a much closer relationship with his Muslim father.<\/p>\n

In fact, the two men<\/a> are even planning on creating a father-son clothing line together.<\/p>\n

Shareef Hadid Jenkins originally comes from Lancaster, Pennsylvania. He now lives in New York City. He told his story in video<\/a> format for I\u2019m From Driftwood<\/a>. The site is a groundbreaking online platform that showcases LGBTI stories and oral histories.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n<\/p>\n

Shareef says he always knew he was different when he was growing up, and was bullied at school because of it. When he came out to his mum, she responded, \u201cThere\u2019s Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve.\u201d<\/p>\n

Related: Muslim father attempted suicide after his son came out, now they\u2019re closer than ever<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

At age 13, he was sent by his mom to live<\/a> with his dad, \u201cto make me become a man<\/a>.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen I came out to my father, he was livid. Actually, he went to a frat brother of his who is a psychologist and took me there and said \u2018Cure my son.\u2019 And the psychologist told him that I am gay<\/a> and that he has to accept it.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

\u201cSo his version of acceptance was, Okay, we\u2019re gonna take you to the mosque every night, you\u2019re going to learn how to be a man<\/a> and you\u2019re gonna learn how to have willpower so that you don\u2019t act on being gay<\/a>, you don\u2019t think about men<\/a>, and that\u2019s the way it\u2019s going to be.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cAnd after a couple<\/a> months of that, I tried to kill myself. So I took a lot of pills and, thank God, I didn\u2019t die. I just woke up and my father was standing over me and he said, \u2018Okay, if you\u2019re going to be gay<\/a>, I can\u2019t do anything about it. You just can\u2019t be gay<\/a> in my house.\u2019 So that\u2019s when I was on the street without my parents.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shareef was taken in by a home for runaway kids. Around 2-3 years later, his father reached out to him and they began to call<\/a> each other occasionally on holidays. His father still did not wish to discuss his son\u2019s sexuality.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

Related: Yes, it\u2019s possible to be bisexual AND Muslim and this guy\u2019s here to prove it<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

Shareef moved to New York City and lived with a boyfriend. A burst appendicitis led to an emergency dash to the hospital for Shareef \u2013 at the insistence of his boyfriend.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy father came the next day with his wife. He took my boyfriend\u2019s hand he said, \u2018Thank you for saving my son\u2019s life.\u2019 And he sat down in the room. It was the first time in my life since coming out that he actively showed that he loved me and that the gay<\/a> thing wasn\u2019t going to stand in the way of his love.\u201d<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

His once-in-a-blue-moon five-minute phone calls<\/a> with his dad turned into ten-minute calls<\/a>.<\/p>\n

A few years passed, and Shareef learned he was HIV positive. Unable to face telling his parents, he instead told them he had cancer. He couldn\u2019t find the words to tell them he had HIV.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey called me a lot more, they \u2013 my dad came up. He took me to dinner. And then I told him I was HIV positive.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

\u201cAnd he cried. He told me that, you know, \u201cYou\u2019re my only son. I\u2019m your only father. We only have one life. A week isn\u2019t going to go by without me talking to you.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIt was almost like him saying, All this homophobia that I was holding onto is not worth not having my son in my life. Because he felt like that was it. I\u2019m about to lose you and I\u2019m not going to take that. And that kind of love coming from parents who threw me out was unexpected. It was what lifted me out of the depression of \u2018Oh my God, I have HIV.\u2019 It gave me life.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo today, I run a business, a non-binary fashion company. I make harnesses, underwear, jumpsuits. My father designs scarves, bags.<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n

\u201cInteresting, right? The guy<\/a> who did \u2013 who couldn\u2019t accept his gay<\/a> son does fashion. Pretty amazing.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re working together to start a line of underwear for African American men<\/a> \u2026 kente cloth underwear, boxers.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s coming a long way from being a child who my parents are like, Get out<\/em>, to actually, like, not only seeing my father for more than five minutes at a time, but working with him on a business, father and son business. And I see this makes him happy and it makes me feel joy.\u201d<\/p>\n

Related: How one Oklahoma church decided to push back against Christian homophobes<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n

Shareef told Queerty he still has a rather distant relationship with his mom, but is OK with that.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe know we love each other but basically we are both adults over the age of 40 who live<\/a> our own lives and live<\/a> far away from each other.\u201d<\/p>\n

His dad designs scarves and formal accessories under the name, Scarves by Rashid. Shareef designs underwear and harnesses under the brand name Boipkg.com<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\u201cHe came to me with the idea that we do a father son project together and so we are in the planning stages of that project, which has brought us together more. He comes to NYC from Philadelphia to go with me to retail conventions and to meet with manufacturers and to pick out fabric.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy plan is to build both of our brands and create a third father and son brand as well.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shareef says his father is still very religious but now has a more live<\/a>-and-let-live<\/a> attitude.<\/p>\n

\u201cHis philosophy is that your life is between you and your god.\u201d<\/p>\n

H\/T: I\u2019m From Driftwood<\/a><\/em><\/p>\n

\n<\/a> <\/a>\n<\/div>\n

\nwww.queerty.com\/dad-rejected-gay-sons-hiv-diagnosis-changed-everything-20190915?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+queerty2+%28Queerty%29<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dad rejected him for being gay<\/a> but son\u2019s HIV diagnosis changed everything Shareef Hadid Jenkins and his father, Roberto Rashid (Photo: Supplied) A man<\/a> has shared details of how his family rejected when he came out as gay<\/a>. However, being diagnosed as HIV has enabled him to forge a much closer relationship with his Muslim … Continue reading Dad rejected him for being gay but son\u2019s HIV diagnosis changed everything<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2466,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[784,1040,1005,31102],"class_list":["post-96600","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-misc","tag-gay","tag-hiv","tag-new-york-city","tag-shareef-hadid-jenkins"],"yoast_head":"\nDad rejected him for being gay but son\u2019s HIV diagnosis changed everything - GAYFRIENDSCHAT.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/dad-rejected-him-for-being-gay-but-sons-hiv-diagnosis-changed-everything\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Dad rejected him for being gay but son\u2019s HIV diagnosis changed everything - GAYFRIENDSCHAT.com\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Dad rejected him for being gay but son\u2019s HIV diagnosis changed everything Shareef Hadid Jenkins and his father, Roberto Rashid (Photo: Supplied) A man has shared details of how his family rejected when he came out as gay. 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