{"id":19674,"date":"2015-06-06T10:20:18","date_gmt":"2015-06-06T14:20:18","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/the-19-funniest-tweets-from-women-this-week\/"},"modified":"2015-06-06T10:20:18","modified_gmt":"2015-06-06T14:20:18","slug":"the-19-funniest-tweets-from-women-this-week","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/the-19-funniest-tweets-from-women-this-week\/","title":{"rendered":"The 19 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week"},"content":{"rendered":"

The 19 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week<\/b>
\nThe ladies<\/a> of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant — but succinct — wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week’s great tweets from women<\/a>, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women<\/a> page for our past collections.<\/big><\/p>\n

\n

time flies when you’re alone with pickles and Netflix<\/p>\n

— Tess Koman (@tessie_the_mess) May 31, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

Just saw a guy<\/a> struggling to unicycle down the sidewalk and wanted to whisper to him, “No one’s making you do this.”<\/p>\n

— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) May 31, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

being an adult is exactly like a birthday party, except when the piñata breaks open it’s full of bills & death<\/p>\n

— Mary Charlene (@IamEnidColeslaw) May 31, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

I’ve live<\/a>-phoned, live<\/a>-blogged & live<\/a> g-chatted Sense & Sensibility ’95 w\/ girlfriends<\/a> for 2 decades. Will we persist in this until we die?<\/p>\n

— Sarah Marian Seltzer (@sarahmseltzer) June 1, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

nothing tastes as good as muting an email thread feels<\/p>\n

— Lara Parker (@laraeparker) June 1, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

When you’re shopping around for a new therapist and are just like<\/p>\n

PLEASE ACCEPT ME AND ALL MY ISSUES <\/p>\n

#kthanksbye<\/a><\/p>\n

— Taylor Trudon (@taylortrudon) June 2, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

I think about the difference between Chet Haze and Colin Hanks on a DAILY BASIS<\/p>\n

— Mallory Ortberg (@mallelis) June 2, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

“So..uh, are you excited about Governor’s Ball?” – how to talk to any Millennial in an elevator<\/p>\n

— Michelle Markowitz (@michmarkowitz) June 2, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

Me Vs. The World: My Journey Wearing An All-White Outfit To Work<\/p>\n

— Carly Ledbetter (@ledbettercarly) June 2, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

Rainy days make me want to stay in bed<\/p>\n

As do sunny days…<\/p>\n

I never actually want to leave my bed….<\/p>\n

— Rescue Ninja (@equinelover137) June 2, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

Sometimes I wonder if high school acquaintances might be fascinated by my Facebook as I am with theirs and then I remember that I am boring.<\/p>\n

— Elise Foley (@elisefoley) June 2, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

“She rides with me, the new Bobby & Whitney \/ Only time we don’t speak is during Sex and the City” do we really think Bey was a SATC fan tho<\/p>\n

— Jazmine Hughes (@jazzedloon) June 3, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

Wish I had the same carefree lack of self-awareness exhibited by grown adults who publicly link to their Amazon wishlists.<\/p>\n

— Akilah Hughes (@AkilahObviously) June 3, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

If you’ve never emotionally connected with an eggplant parm sandwich at 9:30 in the morning, I highly recommend it.<\/p>\n

— outer kase (@worstkase) June 4, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

More ladies<\/a> should leave internet comments on men<\/a>’s accomplishments like “he sucks as an astronaut but i’d sit on his face”<\/p>\n

— dr. dalia ☥ (@DALIAMALEK) May 30, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

if you are wearing a tshirt that says “whatever” wouldnt it be a stronger statement to wear a trash bag<\/p>\n

— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) June 3, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

Bruce Jenner going by Caitlyn instead of Kaitlyn is the biggest “screw you” to the Kardashians I can think of. I love it.<\/p>\n

— Alexis Kleinman (@alexiskleinman) June 1, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

Buying a salad is all fun and games until you have to eat it.<\/p>\n

— Joanna Borns (@robotics) June 5, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

\n

my dog peed on the front door of his obedience school so it’s looking good<\/p>\n

— lauren ashley bishop (@sbellelauren) June 3, 2015<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/p>\n

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms.<\/a> It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.<\/p>\n

www.huffingtonpost.com\/2015\/06\/06\/best-tweets-women-on-twitter_n_7483422.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices&ir=Gay+Voices<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The 19 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week The ladies<\/a> of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant — but succinct — wisdom. Each week, HuffPost Women rounds up hilarious 140-character musings. For this week’s great tweets from women<\/a>, scroll through the list below. Then visit our Funniest Tweets From Women page … Continue reading The 19 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2466,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[107],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19674","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news"],"yoast_head":"\nThe 19 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week - GAYFRIENDSCHAT.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/the-19-funniest-tweets-from-women-this-week\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The 19 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week - GAYFRIENDSCHAT.com\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"The 19 Funniest Tweets From Women This Week The ladies of Twitter never fail to brighten our days with their brilliant — but succinct — wisdom. 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