{"id":112536,"date":"2019-12-14T10:25:53","date_gmt":"2019-12-14T15:25:53","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/guys-like-liam-payne-need-to-stop-writing-songs-about-bisexual-people\/"},"modified":"2019-12-14T10:25:53","modified_gmt":"2019-12-14T15:25:53","slug":"guys-like-liam-payne-need-to-stop-writing-songs-about-bisexual-people","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/guys-like-liam-payne-need-to-stop-writing-songs-about-bisexual-people\/","title":{"rendered":"Guys like Liam Payne need to stop writing songs about bisexual people"},"content":{"rendered":"

Guys like Liam Payne need to stop writing songs about bisexual<\/a> people<\/b><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

This article was previously published on Medium<\/em><\/a> under a different headline.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Monosexuals (people attracted to one gender), it\u2019s time to talk about the songs you\u2019ve been writing about bi<\/a> people. More specifically, it\u2019s time to admit that you need to stop writing songs about us. You\u2019ve proven too many times that you are simply not up to the task.<\/p>\n

As far as I can tell, people who aren\u2019t bi<\/a> have only even written two types of songs about bi<\/a> people:<\/p>\n

<\/div>\n
    \n
  1. \u201cMy partner (usually girlfriends<\/a> because bi<\/a> men<\/a> barely exist in mainstream consciousness) is bi<\/a>, it\u2019s so hot, we\u2019re gonna have a threesome!\u201d<\/li>\n
  2. \u201cThe person I like\/have been flirting with got a boy<\/a>\/girlfriend<\/a> (which ever would make them in a \u201cstraight passing\u201d relationship) instead of being with me, so they must be a fake gay<\/a>!\u201d<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n

    This week, #LiamPayneIsOverParty was trending on Twitter because of the biphobic song on his new album, LP1<\/em>. \u201cBoth Ways\u201d is supposedly a song about Payne\u2019s bisexual<\/a> girlfriend<\/a> and includes such romantic lines as \u201cMy girl<\/a>, she like it both ways\/She like the way it all taste\/Couple more, we\u2019ll call<\/a> it foreplay\/No, no, I don\u2019t discriminate\/Bring it back to my place\/Yeah, she like it both ways (Both ways).\u201d<\/p>\n

    Payne is not the first straight man<\/a> to use the fetishization of bi<\/a> women<\/a> as a catchy hook in his music. Other examples include the Weekend\u2019s \u201cLost in the Fire\u201d (You said you might be into girls<\/a>\/Said you going through a phase\/Keeping your heart safe\/Well, baby, you can bring a friend\/She can ride on top your face\/While I f*ck you straight) and even one of my guilty-pleasures, Tinie Tempah\u2019s \u201cMiami to Ibiza\u201d (I\u2019ll wake up in the morning with a\/Mild case of amnesia\/With a girl<\/a> that like a girl<\/a>\/Like Lindsay Lohan and Queen Latifah(. Th)se songs and the many others like them perpetuate the dangerous stereotype of bi<\/a> women<\/a> as hyper-sexual, sex<\/a> toys for straight couples<\/a>, or down for anything.<\/p>\n

    These stereotypes are one reason why bi<\/a> women<\/a> face such high rates of sexual violence, with research showing that up to 66% or even 75% of bi<\/a> women<\/a> have experienced sexual violence. We can no longer tolerate fetishization in pop culture like music or TV, especially when the sexual violence it leads to is then completely either completely erased or ignored. At current, my organization the Bi Survivors Network, is the only resources specifically for bi<\/a> survivors in the UK, with many bi<\/a> survivors reporting they have had negative experiences when attempted to access help or support.<\/p>\n

    Bi people also have to deal with the second type of invalidating songs, often from gay<\/a> or lesbian<\/a> artists (I\u2019ve personally come across a lot more from lesbians<\/a> than gay<\/a> men<\/a>). Examples include GRLWood\u2019s \u201cBisexual\u201d (Every time we talk, it\u2019s about your boyfriend\/I don\u2019t really wanna hear anymore about him\/Can you talk about anything besides your boyfriend?\/Good goddamn, I don\u2019t wanna hear about your boyfriend), Hayley Kiyoko\u2019s \u201cCurious\u201d (Calling me up, so late at night\/Are we just friends?\/You say you wanted me, but you\u2019re sleeping with him) and Tegan and Sarah\u2019s \u201cBoyfriend\u201d (You treat me like your boyfriend\/And trust me like a like a very best friend\/You kiss me like your boyfriend\/You call<\/a> me up like you want your best friend\/You turn me on like you want your boyfriend\/But I don\u2019t want to be your secret anymore).<\/p>\n

    <\/div>\n

    All of these songs rely on the biphobic stereotypes that bi<\/a> women<\/a> are just straight women<\/a> looking for a bit of adventure, unwilling to leave their boyfriends, cheaters, and just all-round bad or unreliable partners.<\/p>\n

    (Side note; I\u2019ve always wondered why the women<\/a> who write these songs think they are better for the women<\/a> they\u2019re writing about than their boyfriends, when they seem so generally resentful of them and hung up on bisexual<\/a> stereotypes.)<\/p>\n

    While these songs aren\u2019t as damaging as those written by straight men<\/a>, mainly because queer artists will never been given as much mainstream attention or clout, they do contribute to the \u201cbad partner\u201d narrative that makes bi<\/a> people more vulnerable to jealousy-based abuse and to the double discrimination that causes bi<\/a> people to have worse mental health outcomes than gay<\/a> men<\/a> or lesbians<\/a>.<\/p>\n

    <\/div>\n

    As if these tropes being so common in songs wasn\u2019t bad enough, the frequent backlash against bisexual<\/a> artists for creating songs about our experiences salts the wounds. As I wrote about earlier this year, when female<\/a> musicians such as Demi Lavato, Rita Ora, or Ariana Grande who have up until now been assumed straight release songs about their multi-gender attraction, they are often accused of queerbaiting or \u2018doing it for attention\u2019 because bi<\/a> people face a higher burden of proof when it comes to our queer credentials than other members of the LGBT community.<\/p>\n

    So monosexuals, it\u2019s time to stop writing songs about us. You\u2019ve done a pretty terrible job so far. Might I suggest taking a step back and letting us create our own music about our experiences (and in turn accepting that it\u2019s okay if we\u2019re queer in a way that\u2019s different to you). After all, which some many amazing bi<\/a>\/pan\/queer artists out there such as Janelle Monea, Christine & The Queens, Frank Ocean, and Harry Styles<\/a> churning out bop after bop, we\u2019ve got it covered. Thanks.<\/p>\n

    Lois Shearing<\/a> is a bisexual<\/a> activist, freelance writer, and content marketer. They founded the Bi Survivors Network and the anti-biphobia campaign DoBetterBiUs.<\/strong><\/p>\n

    <\/div>\n
    \n<\/a> <\/a>\n<\/div>\n

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    Guys like Liam Payne need to stop writing songs about bisexual<\/a> people This article was previously published on Medium under a different headline. Monosexuals (people attracted to one gender), it\u2019s time to talk about the songs you\u2019ve been writing about bi<\/a> people. More specifically, it\u2019s time to admit that you need to stop writing songs … Continue reading Guys like Liam Payne need to stop writing songs about bisexual people<\/span> →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2466,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[107],"tags":[32830,784,19388,32831],"class_list":["post-112536","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-news","tag-bi-survivors-network","tag-gay","tag-hayley-kiyoko","tag-tinie-tempah"],"yoast_head":"\nGuys like Liam Payne need to stop writing songs about bisexual people - GAYFRIENDSCHAT.com<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.gayfriendschat.com\/socialblog\/guys-like-liam-payne-need-to-stop-writing-songs-about-bisexual-people\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Guys like Liam Payne need to stop writing songs about bisexual people - GAYFRIENDSCHAT.com\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Guys like Liam Payne need to stop writing songs about bisexual people This article was previously published on Medium under a different headline. 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