'Ten Commandments' Judge to Alabama Governor: Ignore Marriage Equality Ruling

Roy Moore, chief justice of the the Alabama Supreme Court, claims the federal courts have no authority over state marriage laws.

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Trudy Ring

www.advocate.com/politics/marriage-equality/2015/01/27/ten-commandments-judge-alabama-governor-ignore-marriage-equali

Community Civility and a Response to the Controversy Over <em>The Vagina Monologues</em> at Mount Holyoke
I’d like to follow up on my previous blog post on the Mount Holyoke College controversy surrounding The Vagina Monologues because of the responses I’ve received. They’ve run the gamut from praise to condemnation, from thanks for informing the community of an important event in trans history to constructive criticism as well as vicious name calling. Aside from the cliché that if the responses are all over the map, I must be doing something right, the criticisms highlighted some very important points, some of which I had space to make in the first blog post, and some of which I didn’t.

The consensus from my fellow actors was that I got it right, so I’m pleased that my memory jives with that of my friends. I also believe I promoted Eve Ensler’s position correctly, as she quickly published her own response, to which I was able to link (thanks to editing delays due to the King holiday). I will reiterate that my purpose in publishing that post was to inform the public that Eve Ensler is not transphobic, nor has she been transphobic, and I could document that because I was part of the ensemble cast performance of the first all-trans cast. I’ve done that, and now to the rest.

Within hours of publication, I was subjected to a Twitterbombing, being described as racist, ageist, elitist and arrogant, and connecting me to a host of questionable LGBT characters. These ad hominem and association-fallacy attacks, what I have called “manufactured strategic outrage,” are too often the reflexive response of some activists. A famous African-American activist, Flo Kennedy, classified these attacks as “horizontal hostility,” describing members of a community attacking their colleagues, actions which often prove to be self-destructive.

The first rule of politics is “Take nothing personally.” Admittedly that is very hard to do, particularly when running for office, because that is a quintessential personal endeavor in our political system. But it is absolutely essential if you’re going to maintain your sanity and be able to move forward and create change. The foremost tool of incumbents is psychological warfare, and while electoral campaigning is known to generate personal attacks, general political activism is rife with them as well.

I was accused of being ageist because I was critical of college students. I see constructively criticizing college students as a sign of respect and a refusal to be patronizing, and I hope, for their sakes, that their professors do the same. In my world ageism is visible in the discrimination suffered by middle-aged workers who were laid off after the economic crash and have yet to find new work, because younger workers are willing (understandably) to work for much less. Discrimination is most serious when directed at those with less power; college students, particularly those at elite schools such as Mount Holyoke, have a great deal of privilege and should have the tools and support to be able to handle criticism. I don’t believe most want to be coddled.

I was accused of being insensitive to persons of color because I challenged a description of Eve Ensler as racist for using the death of Trayvon Martin as an opportunity to raise money for the feminist cause. I agree that efforts such as that, like the efforts of all non-profits that use tragedy and crisis as fundraising opportunities, including those in the national and local LGBT communities, are crass and disrespectful, which is why I don’t do that in my political work. There are moments when one should just put her causes aside and show her solidarity. But it isn’t racist and shouldn’t be used to burn bridges. This calling me a “racist” was truly stood on its head when I was later accused of being disrespectful to college students because “they decided against performing a rich white lady’s play.” Reducing Eve Ensler (this is a real example of reductionism, unlike the use of “vagina” in the play) to a “rich white lady” is an ad hominem attack and can itself be considered racist. Just imagine how you might feel if someone called Selma a “rich black lady’s film” because Oprah was a producer.

Then there was my reference to Calpernia Addams, who was a co-director of the performance and the reason it was performed. Calpernia is a friend, and while she and I vigorously disagree on the role of drag queens in the transgender community (she spends her professional career in the entertainment industry), we do so respectfully and don’t let it impact our friendship. There was once a time when Democrats and Republicans could disagree and remain friends socially, and when professionalism was common, but these activist attacks today reflect a much less civil culture. I don’t think that reduces me to a “Mr. Wilson” character yelling at kids to get off the lawn. For those who don’t get the Mr. Wilson reference, they probably also didn’t get the pop culture reference in the title, which was honorifically referring to the students by referring to Art Linkletter’s TV program back in the ’50s.

I was also criticized for mentioning Calpernia, in spite of her being the historical linchpin of my thesis about the history of The Vagina Monologues, because of comments that she and others made in reference to my blog post. I believe most columnists and bloggers understand that they are not responsible for the comments of others, and attacking me because of others’ comments is nothing more than guilt by association.

This piece wasn’t about “respecting your elders.” Had the students done their homework, there would be no issue. Had they said the play is too essentialist for their tastes, they could have generated an interesting debate about second- and third-wave feminism, which is important particularly because, as I mentioned, there are second wavers still active in claiming they’d like to exterminate all trans persons. For all I know, students on other campuses have navigated this issue quite successfully, and we don’t know it because they handled it without controversy.

There is the important issue of recognizing the consequences of one’s actions, which came up in my comments about trans men and Planned Parenthood. I don’t care if one wants to talk about “pregnant persons” rather than “pregnant women,” or “reproductive rights” rather than “women’s rights.” Planned Parenthood and NARAL aren’t, in the most literal sense, “women’s organizations,” primarily because there are many men who support the work as well. Do trans men have the right to criticize their language as exclusionary? Of course. Do the organizations have the right to reject the claim? Yes. The point was made to me that no one would be harmed by using more inclusive language. That’s the crux of the matter about consequences. Women’s bodily autonomy is still an explosive and divisive issue in this country. Millions of women are at risk as a result of the actions of those who not only oppose abortion rights but also the use of contraception. Millions of women, yet only dozens of trans men. Demanding a change to the language may be seen as selfish and a distraction to the mission, and those who oppose women’s autonomy may grab hold of it to tar the entire progressive movement, and feminism in particular. We don’t need more of that in this climate. The more rights women have in our society, the more rights pregnant trans men will have. They needn’t be explicitly recognized for that to happen. The same holds for anti-discrimination language. All trans subtypes needn’t be publicly recognized for all to be covered under the category of “gender identity and expression.”

Finally, though I listed a number of specific issues here, I want to repeat that I sense that the underlying problem is the reflexive lashing out due to a sense of personalization, which leads to feelings of victimization. Many, if not most, trans persons have been victimized over the course of their lives. I certainly have, and many times. But I’ve learned to think of myself not as a victim but as a survivor and use that as a source of empowerment. When I feel like responding in the moment, I step back and let my thoughts sit and cool off. Playing the victim card, in whatever manifestation — race card, ethnic card, gay card, etc. — simply doesn’t work in the larger battle of changing hearts and minds. Our successes are evidence of that. Let’s learn to channel what Orlando Figes called, in reference to one of the revolutionary parties in 1917 Russia, the “formless revolutionary spirit of students” and continue to build on the good, and do so in the spirit of what my good friend and trans leader Diego Sanchez recently said with respect to engaging and educating allies, patiently, constructively and respectfully:

“It takes time and trust to enact and honor a Treaty of the Heart among allies.”

I thank my interlocutors for engaging with me offline, educating me and listening, and allowing me to speak critically.

www.huffingtonpost.com/dana-beyer/community-civility-and-a-_b_6549050.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices&ir=Gay+Voices

Infamous Anti-LGBT Judge Speaks Out Against Marriage Equality in Alabama

Alabama Supreme Court Chief Justice Roy Moore is clearly distressed by U.S. District Judge Granade’s decision to strike down his state’s ban on marriage equality.
HRC.org

www.hrc.org/blog/entry/infamous-anti-lgbt-judge-speaks-out-against-marriage-equality-in-alabama?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

Challenge To Nebraska's Same-Sex Marriage Ban Moves Forward As Judge Denies Stay of Lawsuit

Sean Mandell

www.towleroad.com/2015/01/challenge-to-nebraskas-same-sex-marriage-ban-moves-forward-as-judge-denies-stay-of-lawsuit.html

Arizona Appeals Court Overturns Monica Jones's Conviction for 'Walking While Trans'

As Monica Jones and her supporters celebrate this victory, the prominent activist says work still remains to vacate her charges and remove unfair laws from the books entirely.

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Mitch Kellaway

www.advocate.com/politics/transgender/2015/01/27/arizona-appeals-court-overturns-monica-joness-conviction-walking-whi

The Time My Boss Outed Me
Embarrassed, humiliated, shocked and even shamed. Those are some of the emotions I felt when my jackass of a boss outed me many years ago.

I’m proud to say that I’ve been out of the closet for several years now, and feel no shame, but it was a long and sometimes painful road.

Back then there weren’t many public figures that were out, and I feared if anyone found out about by sexuality, it could ruin my career in broadcasting.

In 2015, it’s much easier to be out the closet. There’s more acceptance, but make no mistake, there are still plenty of haters out there. In some states, members of the LGBT community can be fired based solely on their sexuality.

Years after the first outing incident, I was working in another city for another employer and was outed again. But this time, it was totally different.

I write about both experiences in my new book, The Perception Myth. Here’s an excerpt:

I was working in a small town in Texas, and when the general manager of the radio station found out I was gay, our relationship took a big turn for the worse. He had listened in on my phone conversations with my friend, Tony. That’s how he found out.

During a staff meeting about our new health plan, my boss announced that we had a million-dollar cap, adding, “That ought to cover AIDS, Brad.” I was mortified. First, I wasn’t out to the rest of the staff and second, what a horrible thing to say! He was an asshole — you will encounter them in your lifetime. He thought I would quit, but I didn’t. I didn’t want to be without a job because that would have given him all the power. I waited until I was offered a good position elsewhere before I gave my notice. That was one of the most satisfying days of my life.

In Texas, and many other states, it’s perfectly legal to fire someone because they’re gay, or say such horrific things to homosexual people. You may not condone homosexuality. You may have religious beliefs that conflict with it, but everyone should support laws to prevent employers from making such remarks. And think about this: If you fire people because they’re gay, they’ll be collecting unemployment — something you’re helping fund anyway.

There was another “outing” that occurred at the office, with a far different outcome. I was hired as an anchor at Fox 25 TV in Oklahoma City, partly because I was a friend of the news director’s wife. I’d like to think I was hired for my skills as well. Since she knew I was gay, and had introduced me to the gay executive producer years earlier, he also knew about my sexuality. The first day I arrived for work, Mike, the executive producer, told the staff that it was nice to have another gay man on the team, or something to that effect. I was stunned! This guy had just outed me in front of the staff. But it was also liberating. I had never really come out at any place of business before, but now everybody knew.

I didn’t have to worry about being found out. Mike did me a favor. I was free to be me and live an authentic life. If someone asked me about a date, I didn’t have to use generic pronouns to describe the guy I went out with the night before. I’m sure there were staff members who made fun of me behind my back, but they do that no matter who you are.

It’s hard to describe the feeling of being absolutely authentic. When there are no lies, you don’t have to worry about mixing up your story or having anxiety about a night out at a gay bar. This was one of the highlights of my career, and mostly for personal reasons. I made real connections with coworkers. They got to know the real me without the walls that I had built at previous jobs. It was refreshing, and true freedom.

I relay these two stories because they are opposite experiences. There’s no telling how people will react if you tell them you’re gay or they find out another way. Thank goodness society is changing and in many places it’s not a big deal to have gay staff members. In fact, some places applaud it. But as I mentioned earlier, there are still areas of the country, namely the south, where you can be fired for being gay. That has to change. Nobody should be forced to hide their true identity in order to put food on the table.

www.huffingtonpost.com/brad-wheelis/my-jackass-of-a-boss-oute_b_6544520.html?utm_hp_ref=gay-voices&ir=Gay+Voices

Anti-Gay Pastor Is Terrified Of Drinking Semen, Especially In Starbucks Lattes

It shouldn’t come as much of a surprise that the same man who warned that “Obama has released the homo demons on the black man” is full of other, equally demented wisdom.

In a recent interview, Pastor David Manning of the ATLAH World Mission Church in Harlem had a few things to say about semen.

He preceded his comments with, “Anytime anybody anywhere speaks the truth it becomes for those who oppose it controversial,” which does have some logical application. But we’ll let his “truth” speak for itself here.

Asked about his previous description of drinking semen as “having a good time,” he responded:

“Well, you know, you are pushing me up against a corner here. A number of people think that semen tastes good. A number of people think that drinking semen is a good idea. No, I don’t think that myself personally. I’m just giving you the references of what other people say. You’ve got literally millions of people around the world that really think that the taste of semen is quite a flavor, and they seek it in the midst of other kinds of activities.”

This includes some “ingenious” people who decided to put semen in Starbucks lattes, which brings a whole new meaning to extra foam.

Also we’re pretty sure if there were a semen industry, he just gave them a new tagline — “Semen — It’s quite a flavor.”

And before you go speculating that Pastor Manning spends way too much time thinking about drinking semen to be straight, he does admit to having been tempted by the “gay lifestyle.” Big shock there.

Another nugget of crazy from his interview is the idea that it isn’t his fault he wants to stone the gays to death, it’s Moses’. #MosesMadeMeDoIt

Here’s the interview if you can stomach it: 

h/t RawStory

Dan Tracer

feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/Q44n-F07FnI/anti-gay-pastor-is-terrified-of-drinking-semen-especially-in-starbucks-lattes-20150127

WATCH: Gay Male Sexual Assault Survivors Speak Out

These young men say it can be difficult for male survivors, especially gay ones, to be taken seriously.

read more

Trudy Ring

editorial.advocate.com/crime/2015/01/27/watch-gay-male-sexual-assault-survivors-speak-out

Legislation Introduced to Provide Equal Veterans Benefits

Today, Senator Jeanne Shaheen (D-NH) introduced the Charlie Morgan Military Spouses Equal Treatment Act
HRC.org

www.hrc.org/blog/entry/legislation-introduced-to-provide-equal-veterans-benefits?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss-feed

PHOTOS: Jonathan Groff Unleashes His Enema Selfie And More Of The Looking Cast On Instagram

Things we’ve learned about Jonathan Groff recently:

• He doesn’t feel brave for getting pounded against a tree
• He’s into sex on the first date and vers guys with receding hairlines

The more you know!

Well we’ve just leaned another tidbit, courtesy of Looking co-star Frankie J. Alvarez’ Instagram feed. We know his preferred brand of enema. We’re living in the information age, after all.

So sad our selfie for Dom ended up on the cutting room floor! I have at least 30 different versions. Just another day at the office: #enemaselfie on #lookinghbo #???? #bffs #patrick #agustin @lookinghbo

A photo posted by Frankie J. Alvarez (@sexytosomeppl) on Jan 25, 2015 at 7:10pm PST

Here’s some more of what the cast is up to these days:

@lookinghbo boys showing some love for the CSA last night. An amazing night in support of casting directors, who fight to get us in the room and argue to get us the job!

A photo posted by Frankie J. Alvarez (@sexytosomeppl) on Jan 23, 2015 at 7:51am PST

When in doubt: #besupportive @lookinghbo #lookinghbo #patrick #agustin

A video posted by Frankie J. Alvarez (@sexytosomeppl) on Jan 18, 2015 at 6:37pm PST

Thanks to the Casting Society of America for inviting us to presenters at the New York ceremony for the #ArtiosAwards which recognize Outstanding Achievement in Casting. It was a true honor to be among such outstanding company. Casting Directors are the unsung heroes of our industry in many ways. Great to see them recognized. #CSA

A photo posted by Raúl Castillo (@officialraulcastillo) on Jan 22, 2015 at 5:51pm PST

Thanks to the good people at Arise Entertainment 360 @arisetv360 for having me on today. Was great chatting with you guys

A photo posted by Raúl Castillo (@officialraulcastillo) on Jan 16, 2015 at 1:15pm PST

????Bear hugs to everybody that watched @lookinghbo this week. #agusteddie #juiceboxrealness #eddiebear #danfranfans

Une photo publiée par Daniel Franzese (@whatsupdanny) le 26 Janv. 2015 à 23h41 PST

????Happy Birthday???? to the incredible @peterdavisnyc! So much ?? for this guy.

A photo posted by Daniel Franzese (@whatsupdanny) on Jan 25, 2015 at 8:44am PST

I love this beach cabin on #Miami beach! #willboone

A photo posted by Russelltovey (@russelltovey) on Jan 24, 2015 at 9:13am PST

With my mate @chattyman in #Miami

A photo posted by Russelltovey (@russelltovey) on Jan 14, 2015 at 9:12pm PST

Dan Tracer

feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/JNdbgCFRMCI/photos-jonathan-groff-unleashes-his-enema-selfie-and-more-of-the-looking-cast-on-instagram-20150127