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Spiders That Give Men Four-Hour Erections Began Hatching In Bananas Purchased From Tesco
Prepare to be absolutely horrified.
The eggs of a highly venomous spider whose bite can kill or, worse, give men burning, stinging, pulsating, hours-long erections were found deeply embedded inside a batch of bananas from a grocery store in the U.K.
The bananas came from Costa Rica and were purchased from a Tesco supermarket by a woman named Maria Layton. (Tesco, you may remember, made headlines back in January when one of its employees told a customer “gay people shouldn’t have babies” and should all “die alone.”) When Layton brought the bananas home, her six-year-old daughter asked for one. That’s when Layton noticed the eggs from the Brazilian Wandering Spider growing on the side.
“I recognized it because I remembered seeing a news story about them,” she told The Telegraph.
Within seconds of making the discovery, the cocoon started to hatch.
“I was so scared!” Layton continued. “I…have read about the Brazilian Wandering Spiders, and was very frightened about the potential threat.”
The venom from the Brazilian Wandering Spider’s bite is known to cause painful erections in men that can last up to four hours. It’s currently being studied by medical researchers for possible use in treatments for erectile dysfunction.
Layton quickly snapped into action, putting the hatching spider eggs into a sealed container then shoving them in her freezer to die. Then she called Tesco customer services, who told her she could return the bananas with the spider eggs for a complete refund, if she wanted.
“Tesco were a bit useless,” Layton said. “I spent an hour-and-a-half ringing round trying to get some help while I had this potentially killer spider in the house!”
A spokesperson for Tesco said: “Our policy is for the customer to take the product to the store where it can be investigated. We don’t have a service whereby someone can go out to the home.”
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Steven Universe Continues To Be One of the Most Queer-Positive Cartoons On TV – WATCH
“Steven Universe” is a television show currently airing on Cartoon Network about a young boy Steven, his father, and his three alien humanoid guardians known as the Crystal Gems. On its surface “Steven Universe” continues in Cartoon Network’s long history of vibrant, whimsical children’s shows. Beneath that, though, “Steven Universe” has been doing some of the most interesting work towards including positive themes of gender and sexual queerness in current television.
Over the show’s two seasons its writers have repeatedly used the Gems ability to fuse with one another to explore the intricacies of physical and emotional identities. In a lighthearted episode entitled “Alone Together” Steven, who is half Gem, accidentally fuses with his female friend Connie and becomes a physically androgynous being whose sole focus is to find a banging dance party. Though Stevonnie presents physically as being predominantly female, the character’s gender is left undefined and Stevonnie the person is uniformly admired by everyone that they meet.
During this season’s past few story arcs “Steven Universe” has hammered home its usually subtle messages about accepting love in all forms in much more explicit ways. In this week season finale’s “Jail Break” we learn that Garnet, voiced flawlessly by Estelle, is actual a near permanent fusion of two separate Gems with a deep romantic love for one another. The significance of the plot twist may seem minor, but as Mey Valdivia Rude writes for Autostraddle messages like Garnet’s can be powerful for young audiences:
“Representation is vitally important for children. Study after study and expert after expert says that when kids see people like them positively portrayed in the media they consume, they are positively impacted, and when they don’t see that same representation, it negatively affects not only them, but how others view and treat people like them.
Especially when we’re still developing, and especially when we are still discovering and exploring our genders and sexuality, it’s important for us to know that we’re not alone and that we have the possibility of a bright future. One way to do this is by creating fictional characters and narratives that show that bright future for people like that.”
Check out a clip of Garnet’s origin story here AFTER THE JUMP…
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Chris Lopez’s male figure work — especially those done on wood — are like a bear hug. You feel surrounded by warmth.
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Gay Man Recounts Coming Out to His Devout Muslim Father (VIDEO)
I’m From Driftwood is a 501(c)(3) nonprofit archive for lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender, and queer stories. New stories are posted on the site every Wednesday.
Khalid el Khatib grew up in the conventional town of Dubuque, Iowa, but in an unconventional setting that became a bigger part of his life in high school. He explains:
I was different than everyone else, not because I was gay but because my father was a Palestinian immigrant that came to the United States in his late 20s and married my mother, who was an all-American girl that was born in Wisconsin and grew up in Iowa. My dad didn’t start practicing, or did not become incredibly devout, until he was sort of middle-aged. I was in high school, and just before my parents divorced, my father was praying four times a day.
Even after coming out to his closest friends and mom at 19 years old, he still struggled with telling his father. He says:
I went to a therapist just for one session. The circumstances were unique because this therapist was part of my dad’s practice, because it was a small town and there were only so many doctors. And he, knowing who my father was, sort of said without saying, “If I were you, I wouldn’t come out to your dad. Your dad is a tough guy. He’s stubborn.” And at that point my father was paying for my school; I was financially dependent on him.
Not knowing how to approach his father was something that still plagued Khalid even after he moved off to New York City and began dating, but he finally decided he had to come out to his father. He recalls:
I decided to fully rip the Band-Aid off, to fly home to Iowa, where my dad was still living, and to come out to him. You tell yourself internally, “I’m going to count to 5, and then I’m going to say it.” So I was constantly counting to 4, never quite making it to 5, just saying that “I flew home to tell you–,” and a sort of look of panic washed over his face, and I couldn’t get it out, and he finished the sentence for me and said, “–that you’re gay?”
Even though his dad rolled around on the ground and offered money to Khalid in an attempt to change him, it was the beginning of a renewed relationship that is still growing now. Khalid reflects on the experience:
I think that anyone that sort of expects to come out to a parent, certainly one that has an incredibly complex history and difficult feelings about gayness, expecting that to be wrapped up neatly — I think that’s an unrealistic expectation. To some extent I think that the complexity of it is something that you should cherish. I think that we have his tendency to vilify people that aren’t accepting or aren’t understanding from the start, and I think the burden that he carries with him is just as heavy if not heavier than the one that I’ve always carried with me.
WATCH:
For more stories, visit I’m From Driftwood, the LGBTQ Story Archive.
Republican Congressman Aaron Schock under scrutiny for taking male companion on official trip to India
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HRC, Equality Texas and NCLR Applaud Introduction of Bill to Protect Kids from Conversion “Therapy”
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WATCH: Alabama House Approves Judges' 'Right to Refuse' Same-Sex Marriages
In a 69-25 vote, Alabama lawmakers approved a bill intended to make sure no judge, minister, or church is ‘forced’ to recognize or perform same-sex marriages.
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