Gaydar Doesn’t Exist, According To New Study We Refuse To Believe

In an effort to debunk the validity of gaydar, researchers at the University of Wisconsin-Madison conducted a study where they challenged the “gaydar myth” according to a report on the University’s news website. The findings, which were published in the Journal of Sex Research, conclude that gaydar isn’t real. Try telling that to gay men everywhere.

William Cox, an assistant scientist at the University’s Department of Psychology who was also the lead author of the study, feels gaydar is less about being able to determine a person’s sexual orientation and more about engaging in harmful forms of stereotyping. “Most people think of stereotyping as inappropriate,” stated Cox. “But if you’re not calling it ‘stereotyping,’ if you’re giving it this other label and camouflaging it as ‘gaydar,’ it appears to be more socially and personally acceptable.”

Cox and his team conducted a series of studies, one of which consisted of manipulating their subjects’ understanding of the term “gaydar.” Three groups of people were given different explanations — one group was told gaydar was real, another was told it was a way of stereotyping and the third group was given no definition. The end result? The group that was told gaydar is real engaged in more stereotyping by assuming men were gay based off of certain cues. For example, if the group was told a particular man liked to go shopping, they felt they were utilizing their gaydar in the assumption that he was gay.

Cox believes, “If you tell people they have gaydar, it legitimizes the use of those stereotypes.”

Good thing they didn’t tell the group the guy liked to get mani-pedis after attending bottomless mimosa brunches. Their gaydars might have gone into circuit overload.

Cox also has a fascinating theory about men who are assumed to be gay if they wear pink shirts and it’s tied into the fact that a small percentage of the population is gay.

“Imagine that 100 percent of gay men wear pink shirts all the time, and 10 percent of straight men wear pink shirts all the time. Even though all gay men wear pink shirts, there would still be twice as many straight men wearing pink shirts. So, even in this extreme example, people who rely on pink shirts as a stereotypic cue to assume men are gay will be wrong two-thirds of the time.”

Umm, did we wake up this morning and get transported back to 1998?

Cox’s research conflicts with a 2008 report that concluded people could accurately guess sexual orientation based on photographs of people’s faces. That study somehow gave the existence of gaydar some validity within the scientific realm.

While Cox and his team of researchers are clearly well intentioned in trying to highlight the existence of prejudice through stereotyping, there is a major design flaw with studies on gaydar that has been overlooked. Gaydar is similar to the “Force” from the Star Wars movies. Just like the Force is always strongest among Jedis, gaydar works the same way for us gays. Similar to the Jedi that trains to use the Force to his advantage, we fine-tune it over time through our life experiences. Way before Grindr (aka the prehistoric times), gaydar is what we relied on to determine how many other gay men were X amount of feet away. It was, and still is, very beneficially for expanding our social circles whether it be meeting new friends or cruising in public. The signals we receive from our gaydars are how we know it’s safe to continue to engage. Take it from a guy who has done the legwork. Gaydar is real.

Gaydar is a feeling. It’s based on a vibe a man gets from another man. It’s about eye contact and body language. It takes face-to-face personal interaction and cannot be acquired by looking at photos of other men in an effort to figure out if they are of the homosexual persuasion. Therein lies a huge difference. Judging one’s appearance from a photograph or based on second-hand information about how he acts is stereotyping. Getting a phone number from a cute guy at Starbucks…that’s gaydar.

Great strides have been made in equality and the quest continues, but when it comes to gaydar, this is one of those times where we have to be separatists and say, “It’s a gay thing.”

We want to hear from our readers. What have your experiences been like when it comes to gaydar? Share your stories in the comments section.

Jeremy Kinser

feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/8g4vaLfpan4/gaydar-doesnt-exist-according-to-new-study-we-refuse-to-believe-20150910

Two Women and a Mountain of Insecurity

When my girl and I walk down the street, people see a lesbian couple in love. A fairly standard one, as these things go, at least in the big city: I’m the tall one, with short spiky hair and a vaguely butchy wardrobe, my arm slung possessively her shoulder. She’s six inches shorter than me and much more feminine. When she’s not in workout gear she dresses like the quintessential power lesbian: impeccably tailored suits, dresses and shoes.

Each of us has things we dislike about our physique. I’m a solid 30 pounds overweight and have bad feet and the bad balance that comes with them. My left knee that reminds me its warranty has expired every time I climb stairs. I have squinty eyes and a snub nose and a canine permanently discoloured by a close encounter with a ship’s anchor chain.

My girlfriend, despite her petite 5-foot-4 frame, has the physique of a swimmer. Her shoulders are broad and her arms well-muscled, as are her legs from her daily stint on the treadmill. She has strong hands with short fingers, and a strong chin that she hates. She dislikes her slender hips, always on the lookout for dresses that make her look curvier, She stresses about her high hairline and the near-invisible scar beneath her nose. She feels self-conscious about them all, considering them unfeminine.

Par for the course, right? If there’s a woman outside of a Zen Buddhist monastery completely satisfied with how she looks, I’ve yet to meet her.

Fortunately, each of us appreciates the things that dissatisfy the other about themselves. She loves my height and curves and forgives the fact that I have no sense of direction or balance. I revel in her stunningly buff physique and her strength and grace and — ahem — well, her glorious posterior, among other things. I love the soft tumbleweed cloud of brown hair that tangles around her in the morning before she takes comb, straightener, and hair product to it, never noticing her somewhat higher-than-average hairline. I love the way that chin of hers juts out assertively when she’s thinking hard about something.

And I love her hands. For years I’ve daydreamed about meeting the perfect woman. Her face was always vague, as was her personality; what I always pictured were her hands, strong and wiry and competent, perhaps veined and roughened with work.

Worthwhile hands.

Hands with a history and strength and confidence reflecting their owner’s.

Hands that knew what they were doing.

When I first met Jessica, I offered to read her palm in a transparent gambit to get my hands on hers. As I traced her lifeline, I knew that this woman and her hands were going to send me head-over-heels. And she did, and still does.

That’s what makes a relationship, I think: When two people not only appreciate those things in their lover which their lover esteems about themselves, but also appreciate those things their lover feels insecure about.

Those insecurities, though–there’s more to them than meets the eye. 

I’ve spent a life with the standard background misogynistic white noise telling me what I should like about myself and what I shouldn’t. I ran out of fucks to give in my early teens, and have since dressed and behaved pretty much as I pleased, gravitating steadily toward the genderqueer end of the spectrum over the years. I’ve been called “sir” a couple of times, and gotten a few nasty looks from cashiers in the boondocks of Appalachia, but on the whole I can assume as much or as little femininity as I please without fear of losing my job or house, being beaten, or killed. 

If I decide to splurge on that gorgeous pair of Johnston and Murphy two-tone wingtips in the shoe store, I don’t consider what impression they’ll make on people who see me wearing them, or question whether my addiction to high-end men’s footwear makes me “less of a woman.” I can stroll down a street in those wingtips, pants, men’s shirt and tweed vest and fedora, confident that I’ll be seen as the person I know myself to be. The things I dislike about myself? They may be informed by societal norms to some extent, but they’re nothing that’s out of the ordinary. 

It wasn’t until I started dating Jessica, who happens to be transgender, that I realized what an awesome gift and privilege it was to be seen as I see myself.

I never have to stare at the suit I plan to wear to work, knowing that some will consider it overfeminine and too sexy and someone else will consider it not feminine enough, and knowing that both of those opinions will affect how I’m judged as a woman. On a coworker, that same suit passes completely without notice. I never have to consider whether I’m wearing too much foundation or not enough. When I try on clothing, I don’t immediately reject those that show off my broad shoulders and narrow hips, regardless of how much I may like the garment or how lovely it looks on me.

My wardrobe and personal style, my makeup and hair and the way I walk and gesture and present myself on the gender spectrum: All of these are the result solely of my desire to express myself and who I am. I don’t need to evaluate every gesture, makeup, and wardrobe choice by how I think others will react to it, and whether it confirms or negates my essentially female nature.

I wish that Jessica didn’t have to think of any of this. I wish that she could wear those sleeveless sheath dresses that show off her mouthwatering shoulders and arms without feeling self-conscious and dysphoric. I wish she felt comfortable in a frothy, bright, and flirty sundress, free from the niggling worry that she looks too over-the-top femme. I wish, now that she’s finally free to embrace the person she knows herself to be, she wasn’t immediately subject to an entirely new set of strictures that she felt she had to conform to, to survive and succeed.

When we walk down the street, no one notices any of these uncertainties. No one knows the fundamental differences that determine how we present ourselves to the world. No one knows that my girlfriend’s chosen hairstyle and wardrobe were selected  not merely for self-expression but also out of self-defense, and that she is so much more invisibly at the mercy of gender norms than I am. 

To the world passing by we’re simply two women walking hand in hand, two girls in love.

DREA LEED is a senior software architect whose interests include big data, search engine optimization, paleography, early music, tall ship sailing, and anything else that holds still long enough to be studied. She attended Mount Holyoke, Queen’s University Belfast, and Indiana University, and has published a book and numerous articles on Renaissance costume and material culture. After a recent 13-month sabbatical sailing around the world, she is currently dividing her time between rural Ohio and Washington, D.C., and keeping an eye out for the next big adventure.
Drea Lead

www.advocate.com/commentary/2015/9/10/two-women-and-mountain-insecurity

Kesha officiates second gay wedding

Kesha officiated her second gay wedding over this week.

The 28-year-old pop singer posted a photo on Instagram on Wednesday (9 September) of herself presiding over the wedding of her hairstylist Vittorio Masecchia and Felipe Noqueira.

‘All u need is love,’ she captioned the image with ring and heart emojis.

Kesha is a longtime supporter LGBT rights and got ordained as a minister in 2012 to officiate the wedding of two lesbian friends.

‘I can’t understand why any person or any law would stand in between that kind of love,’ she said at the time.

The post Kesha officiates second gay wedding appeared first on Gay Star News.

Darren Wee

www.gaystarnews.com/article/kesha-officiates-second-gay-wedding/

PHOTOS: Kim Davis Memes Just Keep Getting Better

Kim Davis rules social media. There are literally hundreds, even thousands, of KD memes circulating, only adding to the the legend of the otherwise unremarkable 49-year-old county clerk, currently enjoying the rights and responsibilities of her fourth opposite-sex marriage.

Related: PHOTOS: More Kim Davis Memes To Help Get You Through Your Work Week

We have to say, people, the memes keep getting better. Some are downright creative. Keep ’em coming.

Scroll down for the latest batch of Kim Davis’ memes…

Related: Kim Davis’ Marriage History Explained In One Handy Flowchart

Graham Gremore

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Cayman Islands denial of legal status to gay couples to be challenged in court

An Argentine born British lawyer that is facing deportation from the Cayman Islands after he lost his job after presenting a talk on LGBTI rights intends to launch a legal challenge to the Caribbean nation’s refusal to recognize gay relationships.

Leonardo Raznovich had been lecturing at Truman Bodden Law School in the Caymans but the school did not renew his contract in June and without a job in the Caymans, Raznovich cannot remain in the country while it refuses to give legal status to his marriage to his husband.

Raznovich believes that was because of his participation in January in a lecture series organized by the school’s student society on Gender and Gay Equality in the Cayman Islands which drew criticism from some lawmakers in the country – though the school’s administration denies this.

Raznovich believes a European Court of Human Rights verdict which found legal recognition of same-sex relationships to be a fundamental human right in Europe provides a legal precedent that will also apply in the Caymans which will force them to allow him to stay in the country on his husband’s work visa.

‘We are very happy living here, so we are going to take this as far as it’s needed because we know the law is on our side,’ Raznovich told Cayman 27 earlier this month.

‘There’s no doubt about this. The law is on our side from whichever angle you want to see it. We’re going to take it all the way that is needed until we get a formal seal of approval to us living here as a family unit.’

Raznovich has been given two weeks to remain in the country and is preparing to begin the legal process of challenging the law.

‘In principle, the steps are, you have an appeal,’ Raznovich said.

‘You have to go through the appeal before the immigration appeal tribunal, and then if that is also negative, then you have the option of continuing your appeal before the grand court on judicial review, the appeal court, and eventually the privy council.’

Raznovich and others believe that the European Court of Human Rights’ July decision that Italy must provide legal recognition to same-sex relationships sets a legal precedent that can apply as far away as Britain’s remaining possessions in the Caribbean.

The court has jurisdiction over the 47 countries that have signed the European Convention on Human Rights – meaning its Italian ruling potentially sets a precedent for every European country except Belarus to provide some form of legal recognition for gay unions.

And as Britain is a signatory, the remaining Caribbean British Overseas Territories – The Cayman Islands, Bermuda, the British Virgin Islands, Anguilla, Monserrat, and The Turks and Caicos Islands – also fall under its jurisdiction.

In 2000 the same court ruled that anti-sodomy laws violate the European Convention on Human Rights which compelled Britain to pass the Caribbean Territories (Criminal Law) Order which decriminalized gay sex throughout its remaining Caribbean possessions.

Now many legal experts expect a similar process here.

Caymans Acting Chief Immigration Officer Bruce Smith told Caymans 27 he could only act in accordance with the law as it was currently written.

‘The Law which covers our actions in respect to what we do is the Immigration Law (2014 Revision),’ Smith said in a statement.

‘Nothing can be added or removed other than through the normal process of bringing a law into effect or the process of amending an existing law. We will always consider matters carefully and decisions will be made in accordance with the laws that are before us and in force.’

The post Cayman Islands denial of legal status to gay couples to be challenged in court appeared first on Gay Star News.

Andrew Potts

www.gaystarnews.com/article/cayman-islands-denial-of-legal-status-to-gay-couples-to-be-challenged-in-court/

Thailand’s first LGBTI protections come into effect

Thailand’s first law specifically protecting LGBTI people came into effect on Wednesday (9 September).

The junta-appointed parliament passed the 2015 Gender Equality Act in March, which punishes discrimination based on gender identity and sexual orientation with up to six months in jail and a 20,000 baht fine.

The law defines ‘unfair discrimination among the sexes’ as any action that segregates, obstructs or limits the rights of a person because they are ‘male or is female or has a sexual expression different from that person’s original sex.

The exemptions in education, religion and public interest were removed from an earlier draft of the law.

The act was launched at the beginning of the week at a three-day workshop attended by 400 participants attended, including representatives from civil society, government ministries, legal experts and media.

Director-General of the Department of Family Affairs and Family Development, Somchai Charoenamnuaysuk, noted that the law bars government agencies, private organizations, or individuals from formulating anti-gay policies, rules, regulations, measures, projects or operating procedures.

‘Cooperation from all sectors is key in moving forward with the enforcement of this Act in order to create an equal and just society,’ he said.

‘The public plays an important role in keeping a watchful eye on cases of discrimination, providing support to LGBTI people, as well as ensuring compliance with the rules, regulations and measures.’

A civil unions bill and new constitution that recognizes transgender people are also under consideration.

The post Thailand’s first LGBTI protections come into effect appeared first on Gay Star News.

Darren Wee

www.gaystarnews.com/article/thailands-first-lgbti-protections-come-into-effect/

Watch: New Stonewall clip features Marsha P Johnson

A new clip from the Stonewall film features Marsha P Johnson.

The African-American drag queen and transgender activist, played by cisgender actor Otoja Abit, is introduced as ‘the queen of queens’ and tells the other characters the P in her name stands for ‘pay it no mind.’

By some accounts, Johnson threw the first brick and sparked the 1969 riots that the film is based on.

Critics have accused openly gay director Roland Emmerich of ‘whitewashing’ and ignoring drag queens and transgender women of color such as Johnson and her friend Sylvia Rivera.

The trailer focused on a fictional white man (played by Jeremy Irvine) from the Midwest who moves to New York City after being kicked out by his parents and gets caught up in the riots.

This led to an outcry on social media and calls for a boycott of the film.

Stonewall hits theaters on 25 September.

Watch the clip below:

The post Watch: New Stonewall clip features Marsha P Johnson appeared first on Gay Star News.

Darren Wee

www.gaystarnews.com/article/watch-new-stonewall-clip-features-marsha-p-johnson/

Will Kim Davis Fire Her Deputies?

Kentucky county clerk Kim Davis, freed from jail Tuesday, says she just wants an “accommodation” for her faith-based opposition to same-sex marriage, such as taking her name off marriage license forms, and ostensibly would not object to her deputies issuing licenses to same-sex couples. But now some of her supporters are saying she should fire the deputies who served such couples in her absence.

Ante Pavkovic, one of the organizers of recent pro-Davis rallies, marched into the Rowan County clerk’s office in Morehead, Ky., today, waving a sign at the deputy clerks that read, “Fire the cowardly clerks that are lawbreakers,” Reuters reports. He also told the clerks they should not continue to facilitate same-sex marriages, and a deputy sheriff asked him to leave.

Reuters asked one of Davis’s attorneys, Harry Mihet of right-wing group Liberty Counsel, if she would fire anyone, but he did not offer a direct answer, saying instead that Davis loves her deputies and was trying to make arrangements that would not violate the law or the deputies’ consciences.

Apparently, however, most of her deputies have no conscientious objections to issuing marriage licenses to all couples regardless of gender. Five of her six deputies expressed willingness to serve same-sex couples, with the lone holdout being her son, and several same-sex pairs did receive licenses in her absence. Mihet, though, told Reuters the deputies feared legal consequences if they did not issue the licenses.

But Brian Mason, the deputy designated by his colleagues to handle licenses for same-sex couples, told both Reuters and Louisville’s Courier-Journal today that he would continue to issue the licenses, even if Davis tells him not to.

Earlier reports had indicated Davis would return to her office Friday, but Liberty Counsel officials now say she will go back Monday. She was jailed last Thursday for contempt of court because she defied a federal judge’s order to comply with the law and issue licenses to all eligible couples; the same judge, David Bunning, freed her Tuesday because the willingness of deputies to serve same-sex couples satisfied his order. He also ordered Davis not to interfere with the licensing process when she returns to work — if she does, she could be sent back to jail.

Whether she will comply remains an open question. Her legal team has been cagey about how she will handle the matter, with Liberty Counsel attorney Mat Staver saying she “will not violate her conscience” and that nothing has changed because her name is still on the license forms. However, he also says the licenses her deputies issued to same-sex couples are null and void, as the deputies granted the licenses without Davis’s authorization.

Staver has urged Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear to call a special session of the legislature to deal with the license forms, but Beshear said Tuesday he will not do so. Two other county clerks are also refusing to issue licenses to same-sex couples; unlike Davis, they have not faced legal consequences because they have not been sued — yet. But that’s three counties out of 120 in the state, with the other 117 recognizing marriage equality as the law of the land.

www.advocate.com/marriage-equality/2015/9/09/will-kim-davis-fire-her-deputies

Kim Davis returns to Rowan County Clerk’s office Monday – will she obey the law?

After defying a court order, spending several days in jail, and appearing at a rally with Mike Huckabee, gay marriage opponent Kim Davis plans to return to her job as Rowan County clerk on Monday.

Davis spent part of Wednesday going through a large pile of letters that were awaiting her after her release from jail a day earlier, according to WHAS-11.

‘I am deeply moved by all those who prayed for me,’ Davis said in a statement. ‘All I can say is that I am amazed and very grateful. I am enjoying spending time with my husband, my family, and my three dogs.  I have also been spending time reading boxes of letters expressing support and prayers from people around the country.’

It remains to be seen whether Davis will comply with a judge’s order that she not interfere with the issuance of marriage licenses to same-sex couples who request them.

The first member of her staff to issue a license to a same-sex couple last week was Brian Mason who is a deputy for Davis. He tells BuzzFeed News he plans to continue to issue licenses even if Davis tells him not to when she returns to work.

‘I would issue licenses,’ Mason said. ‘Yes.’

US District Court Judge David Bunning released Davis from jail on the condition that she ‘not interfere in any way, directly or indirectly, with the efforts of her deputy clerks to issue marriage licenses to all legally eligible couples.’

If she does interfere, Davis could find herself back behind bars.

The post Kim Davis returns to Rowan County Clerk’s office Monday – will she obey the law? appeared first on Gay Star News.

Greg Hernandez

www.gaystarnews.com/article/kim-davis-returns-to-rowan-county-clerks-office-monday-will-she-obey-the-law/

Acclaimed Film About Gay Life In Rural Wyoming Is Still Amazing 15 Years Later

When Thomas Bezucha’s Big Eden was first released in 2000 (five years before the Wyoming-set Brokeback Mountain and two years after the Wyoming murder of Matthew Shepard), the gay rural love story set in the fictional town of Big Eden, Montana earned best film awards at Outfest, Frameline and other LGBT film festivals as well as being nominated for a GLAAD Media Award. At that time it was known as the most honored film in the history of gay and lesbian film festivals. Big Eden has since gone on to secure a steady home on most Top 100 gay film lists and it is finally being released on Blu-ray for its 15th anniversary in October.

While even Roger Ebert noted the film’s implausible premise that a community of small-town characters could be so heartwarmingly pro-gay, writer-director Bezucha struck the perfect chord of wish fulfillment as thirty-something closet case Henry (played by the charmingly average Arye Gross) revisits his hometown and comes up against his straight high school crush Dean (played by Matt Bomer‘s hunky White Collar co-star Tim DeKay) and possible new love interest Pike (the terrific Eric Schweig, who won the Best Actor award at Outfest for his performance).

This fresh new HD version of the trailer above looks terrific. The Blu-ray is coming from Wolfe Video on October 13th just two days after National Coming Out Day.

Jenni

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