A Trans Sisterhood
Co-written with my sister: Rachael Ball

My parents had a surprise; tiny, so beautiful. My new baby sister. How wonderful it would be having another girl to talk to, to share my secrets with. Here was someone that was sure to see me, the real me. I could only hope that she would someday understand.

We were as close as a brother and sister could be. Saturday morning cartoons, I’d cling to his back watching all kinds of shows together; from He-man to Care Bears. He’d occasionally shrug me off his shoulders, but I just wanted to be close to the brother I admired so.

Saturday morning cartoons, as it was for many children of the 80’s, was always a fun filled day. Having my sister there gave me an excuse to watch all of the shows that typically appealed to young girls like us. My favorite had to be Rainbow Brite. It was so unapologetically girly.

Bath time always turned into an all-out war, with various small toys representing soldiers on opposing sides. He was a little mean always adjusting the rules to favor his side. Whenever I had an awesome force field, he had the one and only force field breaker.

I never understood why my sister looked different from me. While I was still in Kindergarten our parents had us take baths together, usually while mom washed our hair. But I was confused, frustrated even. Looking at her I knew that I wasn’t like most girls. I thought that perhaps it may just fall off.

Huddled beneath our grand fortress of blankets, I sat entranced by the shadows cast upon my bedroom wall by my brother’s flashlight. Holding his hand in front of the light, he wove a fairy tale. The giant and his unusual friend the magic pail. I laughed at his silly voices forgetting my fears, protected by his presence; drifting into a blissful sleep.

A bit of a frightened child, I could never stand to see her scared, or upset; what sister would? As our bond developed, I found that I could ease her frenzied mind by telling her stories. I never read books to her; instead I preferred spinning my own tales of magical lands, where nothing could harm us.

He always had the best ideas. We had many adventures in our backyard. An overgrown neglected grass became a jungle as we crouched low in the underbrush with our custom made bug hunting gear. I could even face the creepy ones with him by my side.

Of all my childhood memories, the important one at least, she was there. From our bug safaris to our entrepreneurial adventures with “Spookies,” our Halloween themed gambling casino, and our sisterhood couldn’t be stopped. In most respects we were best friends. She saw me differently, she couldn’t really see me.

Summertime meant vacation. We watched as the countryside passed us by. Hours on the seemingly endless road. Whether we were camping out under the stars, swimming in hotel pools, or visiting family; I had my big brother there to make anywhere feel like home.

In the years spent traveling on the road we had many adventures. I delighted in my ability to sound just like my sister; much to the chagrin of my parents. We’d fall asleep in the back seat, one atop the other. As a teenager in Vegas I was brave enough to buy my first dress, which I had to give to my sister after my mother discovered it.

Childhood passed us by; mine came to an abrupt stop. At 16 I was pregnant. My big brother seemed to look at me differently that day as I broke the news. I had rarely seen him cry and yet he wept. I faced a new challenge scared and afraid but, my big brother enlisted and sailed far away. I wanted to hold onto him…. life had other plans for us both.

Only months before my sister’s unexpected pregnancy, I survived a suicide attempt. I couldn’t bear to live, to look my family in the face pretending to be their son. My parents didn’t need another shock. I made the choice to leave and moved to Japan with the Navy. I am so sorry sissy for leaving you when you needed me most.

I settled into married life and motherhood, as he got to explore the world. Years past, together at our childhood home; up late camping in the living room, he told me what he had longed to say. He was my big sister and always had been. Confused but supportive I watched as she modeled her outfits. It dawned on me, I had never seen him this truly happy until I really saw her.

In my travels across the planet I never stopped longing to be myself, to be a big sister. Long after I left the service, I found myself standing nervously in a dress, in front of my sister; the truth of my life laid before her. Then, as I had always hoped to do, to be… she accepted me as her sister.

Watching her lay there in a hospital bed, through her winces of pain, I was relieved; happy to share this moment with her. She had been reborn. Now everyone would see her. As my brother she’d always looked out for me. Now I was there to hold her hand. The sister I had always dreamed of, there all along. I see you Sissy and you are amazing!

Throughout our lives, all I ever wanted was to be a big sister. As I was wheeled into my gender confirmation surgery, I took comfort in knowing that my family was there. That when I woke up, she would be there to support me, her big sister. And to you, sissy, thank you for seeing me, for accepting me, and for loving me.

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This Lesson On Sexual Consent Is The Most British Thing You Will Ever See

Consent: It’s important.

Like, really, really important.

But we hope you already knew that.

What you probably didn’t know, though, is that you can teach the basic principles of sexual consent with a tea analogy.

The result is the most British thing you will ever lay your eyes on.

Watch below:

Dan Tracer

feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/6kejq5iMP9I/this-lesson-on-sexual-consent-is-the-most-british-thing-you-will-ever-see-20151115

Actor Riley Carter Millington is first trans man to claim top spot in 2015 Rainbow List

Trans actor Riley Carter Millington took first place in the Independent on Sunday’s 2015 Rainbow List.

After becoming the first trans actor playing a trans character in a continuous role on British television when he landed a role in long-running soap East Enders, Millington now also became the first trans man to take the Rainbow List’s top spot.

The jury said the actor and his success in mainstream television represented ‘a tipping point for the representation of transgender people in the media’.

‘We received thousands of nominations, and the decision meeting with a panel of highly respected judges was a brilliant, loud, hotly debated day,’ said Lisa Markwell, editor of the Independent on Sunday.

‘This year we’ve worked hard to find people – both well-known and unsung heroes – who really are inspiring and I’m delighted that the list is bigger, better and more diverse than ever before.’

Released on Sunday, November 15, the list annually honors and celebrates the 101 most influential lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans people in Britain.

For the first time in its 15-year history, the 2015 list also included intersex people and the jury placed great emphasis on this – with the result of three intersex people landing spots in the top ten.

Runner-up to Millington is intersex advocate and drugs therapist Sarah Graham, who described being intersex as ‘part of all creation’ when she publicly spoke about her experiences as an intersex woman.

Holly Greenbury and Dawn Vago, co-founders of Intersex UK, were awarded fifth place in recognition of their work in educating, informing and campaigning in a big to remove social prejudice and ignorance surrounding intersex people.

Rugby league player Keegan Hirst, who came out this summer, the UK’s youngest MP Mhairi Black, as well as model Cara Delevigne, trans actor Rebecca Root, star of the BBC’s trans sitcom Boy Meets Girl, and Great British Bake-Off finalist and anesthetist Tamal Ray.

The post Actor Riley Carter Millington is first trans man to claim top spot in 2015 Rainbow List appeared first on Gay Star News.

Stefanie Gerdes

www.gaystarnews.com/article/actor-riley-carter-millington-is-first-trans-man-to-claim-top-spot-in-2015-rainbow-list/

PHOTOS: Last Call To Get Your Booty Call In San Francisco

One of San Francisco’s longest-running parties, Booty Call Wednesdays, is coming to an end. Please join us in a collective sigh of disappointment.

Siiiiiiigh.

“I will be bringing Booty Call Wednesdays to an end at the end of this month,” host Juanita MORE! said in a statement released this week. “This party has always been about bringing people together and has thrived off the energy of regulars and newcomers alike. It is considered a San Francisco nightlife institution in the Castro District throughout its eight year run.”

Related: PHOTOS: In San Francisco, Even State Legislators Love Booty Call

Booty Call has been attended by thousands of club goers over the years, and has featured everyone from singers Jake Shears and Ke$ha to CA State Senator Mark Leno, as well as some of the Bay Area’s hottest freaks, geeks, misfits and go-go boys.

To commemorate this truly iconic club night, we’ve compiled 50 photos taken over the years that we feel perfectly capture what made Booty Call Wednesdays such a smashing success.

Scroll down for a few of the pics, and see the full gallery over at GayCities…

Photo source: Booty Call Wednesdays

Graham Gremore

feedproxy.google.com/~r/queerty2/~3/liYpCcT1mv4/photos-last-chance-to-get-your-booty-call-in-san-francisco-20151115

Hundreds rally to protest Mormon Church’s new anti-gay rules

Hundreds or some 1,000 people with roots in the Mormon faith gathered in City Creek Park in Salt Lake City on Saturday to renounce the church’s new policies targeting gay men and lesbians, and their children including a ban on baptisms for children of gay parents until the kids turn 18. Afterwhich, they must disavow gay marriage and stop living with their parents.

Earlier this month church leaders released its book of guidelines, known as Handbook1, which also states that Mormons in same-sex marriages or similar relationships must face disciplinary councils — and possible excommunication.

According to media reports, as many as 1,000 people pledged to resign en masse from the Mormon Church.

The Salt Lake City Tribune quoted attorney Mark Naugle as saying that he had helped many Mormons expedite their paperwork to resign their memberships in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

Their forms were to be mailed to nearby LDS Church headquarters to have those members’ names removed from the register.

The post Hundreds rally to protest Mormon Church’s new anti-gay rules appeared first on Gay Star News.

Sylvia Tan

www.gaystarnews.com/article/hundreds-rally-to-protest-mormon-churchs-new-anti-gay-rules/

Democrats Again Show Big Contrast With GOP

There was no talk of LGBT issues at Saturday night’s Democratic presidential debate, but plenty of other policy discussions to process as the candidates met at Drake University in Des Moines.

The debate once again underscored that while there are differences between the three Democratic candidates, they differ from each other far less than they differ from the Republican field, as front-runner Hillary Clinton pointed out.

The former secretary of state, Vermont Sen. Bernie Sanders, and former Maryland Gov. Martin O’Malley (who is also a former mayor of Baltimore) all said they want to raise the minimum wage, differing only by how much. Most Republican presidential hopefuls claim raising the minimum wage would result in job losses, but the Democrats said a higher minimum wage will mean more disposable income, which people will spend, therefore leading to creation of jobs.

Sanders said the nation needs to move toward a “living wage.” “It is not a radical idea to say that someone working 40 hours a week should not be living in poverty,” he said.

There was no demonizing of undocumented immigrants or call to build border walls, unlike that coming from Donald Trump, whom O’Malley called an “immigrant-bashing carnival barker.” O’Malley noted that there was zero net immigration from Mexico in the past year, and all candidates said they support bringing undocumented immigrants out of the underground economy with a path to legal status that will enable them to earn better wages.

While the Republican mantra on the Affordable Care Act, a.k.a Obamacare, is “repeal and replace,” no such denunciation came from the Democrats, although Sanders wants to replace it with universal, single-payer health insurance. He wants to end the “embarrassment,” he said, of the U.S. being the only developed nation that doesn’t guarantee health care to everyone. Clinton said the ACA is a great achievement that needs to be built on, and Sanders agreed that it was a step in the right direction.

Moderator John Dickerson of CBS News pointed out that Clinton backed single-payer when she worked on an attempt at health care reform during husband Bill’s presidency. “The revolution never came,” she said.

Sanders said that revolution won’t come overnight, and it won’t come without campaign finance reform — the latter topic underscoring a key sticking point between him and Clinton. He once again described her as far too beholden to corporate interests, especially Wall Street financial companies, that have donated to her campaign. Clinton continued to assert that she would be independent, saying liberal economist Paul Krugman has endorsed her plan for financial reforms and a couple of hedge-fund billionaires have created a super PAC to oppose her.

Clinton also said some of her Wall Street connections come from the fact that as a New York senator she helped rebuild the financial industry after it was devastated, physically and otherwise, by the attacks of September 11, 2001. Sanders made it clear he held no brook for Wall Street types, saying, “The business model of Wall Street is fraud.” If the famously trust-busting President Theodore Roosevelt — a Republican — were alive, he would want to break up the nation’s big banks.

O’Malley, for his part, said there are many good people working in finance, but that he would protect “Main Street” small businesses from the excesses of Wall Street.

Sanders invoked another Republican president from the past when he was asked how high he would raise taxes to pay for the many social programs he advocates, such as free public higher education for all. The highest marginal tax rate wouldn’t be as high as it was in the 1950s, he said: “I’m not that much of a socialist compared to Eisenhower.” It was one of the applause lines of the night.

Education was an area where Sanders and Clinton diverged; he wants all public colleges and universities to be tuition-free, which she proposes this only for community colleges. She said all people need to have some investment in their education, and that making all public colleges and universities tuition-free would benefit the wealthy as well as the needy. She does back reforms that would allow students to graduate debt-free, she said.

There was also some divergence over gun laws, with Sanders’s rivals again pointing out his votes against some reforms. Clinton called for universal background checks on gun purchasers and the closing of a loophole that allows buyers at gun shows to avoid them. There was a bit of unpleasantness among the candidates here, with O’Malley saying Clinton had been on “three sides” of the issue and Sanders taking a jab at O’Malley by saying Baltimore is probably not among the safest cities in the nation.

Foreign policy and terrorism were prominent in everyone’s mind in light of the terrorist attacks in Paris Friday, but here the candidates were largely unified, saying the U.S. must have allies rather than taking a go-it-alone attitude in the fight against terrorism. The radical Islamic State group has claimed responsibility for the Paris attacks, but the candidates also made clear that no one should demonize all Muslims as terrorists. Sanders reiterated that there is a battle going on “for the soul of Islam.”

They also endorsed letting a large number of refugees from war-torn Syria into the U.S., while calling for a screening process that would assure no one with intent to harm the country would get in.

On the topic of Clinton’s emails as secretary of state — especially those relating to the attacks on the U.S. mission in Benghazi, Libya — Sanders reiterated that yes, he is still tired of hearing about the emails, and the media should instead focus on issues that really affect the nation. When Clinton was asked if there are major revelations still to come from the emails, she said, “I think after 11 hours that’s pretty clear,” referring to her marathon testimony before a congressional committee.

Dickerson’s last question involved what challenges each candidate has faced that would prepare him or her for the presidency. Clinton said it would be, as secretary of state, being part of the group that decided whether to go after Osama bin Laden. Sanders said it was working out legislation on veterans’ issues that required him to regroup after being unable to win support for his version and work with Republicans to get a bill through. O’Malley said there is likely no challenge a mayor or governor faces that would compare to those faced by a president, but he assured the audience that he knew how to manage people in a crisis.

In their closing statements, O’Malley said he would bring the new ideas the nation needs; what it doesn’t need, he said, is “polarizing figures from our past.” Clinton said she would do the president’s job, which is “to do everything possible to lift up the people of this country.” Sanders closed with a call to change campaign finance, guarantee health care, and end childhood poverty — none of which will happen, he said, without a revolution.

Find a full debate transcript here.

Trudy Ring

www.advocate.com/election/2015/11/14/democrats-again-show-big-contrast-gop

Hong Kong LGBTI rights group calls on UN to rebuke govt’s treatment of trans people

Hong Kong’s LGBTI rights group The Pink Alliance will formally call on the UN Committee Against Torture next week to rebuke the government for its ill-treatment of transgender people, reports the South China Morning Post (SCMP) today.

The group has singled out the government’s requirement for transgender individuals to undergo full realignment surgery, a series of painful and prohibitively expensive medical procedures which include genital construction and sterilization, before they can legally change their gender status.

It said the UN’s special rapporteur on torture had recognized that such requirements might constitute torture or inhumane treatment.

A 2015 report by the Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Human Rights on discrimination against individuals based on their sexual orientation and gender states, ‘United Nations mechanisms have called upon States to legally recognize transgender persons’ preferred gender, without abusive requirements, including sterilization, forced medical treatment or divorce.’

Transgender people, whose stated gender status in their identity documents and passports do not match the gender they present in, face challenges when traveling, opening a bank account, getting a job and a home without encountering prejudice, and being able to marry.

The Department of Justice is said to have been leading a review of the rules for almost two years but has yet to announce any conclusions.

In a column published in the same newspaper on Oct 29, Dr Sam Winter, head of the sexology team at Curtin University in Perth, Western Australia and former Hong Kong resident, urged the city’s medical bodies to align themselves with medical opinion worldwide and make their positions known to the government.

‘Every organisation I have listed says it clearly: surgical requirements for legal gender recognition are in violation of basic rights (including to health) and may constitute coerced medical practices,’ Winter wrote.

The Office of the High Commissioner for Human Rights, World Health Organisation, UN Development Programme, Amnesty International, Open Societies Foundation, World Professional Association for Transgender Health, World Association for Sexual Health and the American Medical Association now back the call for an end to gender recognition policies that impose medical preconditions.

The column added that the World Medical Association (WMA), which represents 10 million physicians and 102 national medical associations – including the Hong Kong Medical Association (HKMA), last month spoken in favor of the right of all transgender people to self-identification – without coercive treatment of any kind, including forced and coerced sterilization.

The post Hong Kong LGBTI rights group calls on UN to rebuke govt’s treatment of trans people appeared first on Gay Star News.

Sylvia Tan

www.gaystarnews.com/article/hong-kong-lgbti-rights-group-calls-on-un-to-rebuke-govts-treatment-of-trans-people/